Si Lyssander at that side! ---------------------------------->
Pagpasensyahan niyo na po yung english ko at pati ako ay nanosebleed sa paggawa niyang mga lines na yan.hahahahaha. ^__^
VOTE.COMMENT.BE A FAN!! ^__^
TWO WEEKS LATER....
"Ate Lian,Mom and Dad want you downstairs in five minutes,"a man's voice cutted through my thoughts.
"Ha?"Napalingon ako sa nagsalita.
Nakita ko ang nakakunot na noo ng kapatid ko--si Lyssander.Nakatingin siya sa akin at kitang-kita ko ang bakas ng awa sa mga mata niya.
Buti pa siya,may pakiramdam.Hindi tulad ng mga magulang namin na daig pa ang yelo sa kalamigan at bato sa kawalan ng emosyon o damdamin.
Hindi na ako muling nagsalita pa.Tumango lang ako at muling ibinaling ang tingin sa salamin na kaharap ko mula pa kaninang umaga.Lunch time na pala pero ni hindi ko man lang napansin ang paglipas ng oras.
Ganito naman lagi eh,mula nang dumating ako diot sa Hong Kong almost two weeks ago.Hindi ko namamalayan ang paglipas ng oras dahil lagi na lang naglalakbay ang diwa ko sa mga taong naiwan ko sa Pinas.Gumagalaw ako ayon sa utos ng mga taong nasa paligid ko.
Ayaw ko ng ganito.Yung parang wala akong pakiramdam.Yung parang wala akong kakayahang mag-isip para sa sarili ko.Yung sumusunod na lang ako sa sinasabi ng iba.
Pero inalis na nila ang lahat ng iyon mula nang guluhin nila ang buhay ko.Hindi nila isinaalang-alang ang mararamdaman ko.Ang tanging mahalaga sa kanila ay ang kanilang kagustuhan.Wala silang pakialam sa mga taong nasasaktan nila.Palibhasa,wala silang pakiramdam at hindi nila alam kung paano masaktan ng labis.
Miss na miss ko na ang mga mahahalagang taong naiwan ko sa Pinas na naging parte ng buhay ko sa nakalipas na labingwalong taon ng buhay ko.
Parang gusto kong bumulalas ng iyak sa tuwing naaalala ko ang hitsura ng mga 'magulang' ko habang mahimbing silang nakatulog at pinagmamasdan ko sila.Ganoon din ang huling sandali ng pagsasama namin ni Zer at ng mga kaibigan ko.Labis akong nangungulila sa kanila.
Ilang beses na akong natukso na tawagan sila pero pinipigilan ko ang sarili ko.Mawawalan ng silbi ang lahat ng mga ginawa ko para lang hindi nila malaman ang totoong nangyayari sa akin kung kokontakin ko sila.Alam kong kailangan kong panindigan ang naging desisyon ko.Kailangan.
Kailangan kong maging malakas at harapin ang mga problemang nakaumang sa akin.
"Ate?"pukaw sa akin ni Sander.
Napatingin ulit ako sa kanya.Ngumiti ako ng pilit."Sige,susunod na ako."
Nakita ko na hindi niya masyadong naintindihan ang sinabi ko.
Oo nga pala,dito nga pala siya lumaki sa HK kaya di niya naiintindihan ang Filipino.Tsk!
"I'll follow later."
"Oh,okay.I'll go now,"he said simply then exited through the door.
Napabuntung-hininga ako nang muli akong mapag-isa sa silid.Sa marangyang silid na inilaan sa akin.
Marangya nga ngunit,tila kaylamig naman.Kulang sa pagmamahal.Wala ang warmth na nararamdaman ko sa bahay o sa silid ko sa bahay namin sa Pinas.Walang buhay.Wa----
Hep.Stop thinking about them or the Philippines if you wanna survive,Lian,parang paalala ng isang bahagi ng utak ko.
Tama.Kailangan ko nang tigilan ang pag-iisip ng mga bagay na nakakakapagpaalala lang sa akin sa mga bagay na naiwan ko sa Pinas.
I can do this.I need to.
After closing Lyssandras' room's door,I cant help but sigh.Seeing how miserable she was brings so much pain in my heart though I've just met her almost two weeks ago when she came here with our parents.
Eversince she came,I haven't seen her smile a REAL smile.I could see those hurts and pains in her eyes.Sure,she give us those wide smiles but I observed it isnt reachng her eyes.Those eyes seem to be lifeless.No life.They're void of warmth.
She was acting like a robot.Just doing whatever she's told to do.She doesnt talk that much.She's just quiet.Many times would I see her thinking so deep,as if she was in another place.She was here with us,physically,but not emotionally.
She also seems to be lifeless.I sometimes hear her sobs and cries she tried so hard to control, especially at night when I pass by her room.Hearing those things,I could feel something like a hand squeezing my heart painfully.
I wanted to comfort her but I dont know how.I'm not used to comforting other people,nor am I used to seeing other people very emotional.Well,you see,i've grown up in a family where there are no emotions,no feelings,everything was treated formally.
I was also trained to be that way.It was what our parents want me to.They want me to be stiff,rigid,numb,not to feel anything because they believe,emotions will cause me downfall,especially in business.They say I should treat everything and everyone formally.It's what they do.They're always formal,even when they talk to me.No affection,no concern,nothing at all.It was just like a pure business.
I know it may sound unbelievable,but it's true.
If Ate Cielo didn't came in my life,maybe up to now,I would not have known what 'emotions' really mean.Maybe I'm still as cold as my parents are.
When Ate Cielo came,I've come to appreciate emotions.I've somewhat learned to express mine in little ways though I'm not yet accustomed to it.I'm still hard up in showing what or how I really feel.As I've said,I've grown up with people around me showing no or at least 'less' feeling or emotions at all.It's not that easy to just change myself completely,you know.
I dont really know how to speak in Filipino because no one taught me so.I only speak in English,Chinese or Spanish.I am still learning to speak othe languages such as French and others because it is very important to know how to speak in different languages especially in the business world..But I've already started to study how to speak in Filipino when my parents told me I'm going to meet my sister who have grown from Manila.I didn't ask questions as to why she hasn't grown up with me or our family.I just think I already knew the answer.Old Chinese's culture isn't a secret to me.
By the way I am Lyssander Yun,16 years old.I know that I seem not to act my age because you see,there's a great responsibility lying ahead of me.SO I really need to mature this early.
I know all about Ate Cielo's arranged marriage to a son of our parents' business collegue who were also Fil-Chi,though I haven't met the guy yet.But our parents assured us that he was a good guy.
I dont have anything against those arranged marriages not until I saw how devastated my Ate was.I realized that it isn't really a good thing.It is like taking away someone's life.I'm starting to think that those arranged marriages are not really a good solution to secure one's wealth.
I myself had been long informed about my arranged marriage to a certain Ranjela Lee.i havent met her yet but I would,in the future.
In the future.........
BINABASA MO ANG
My Ladies' Man!Romance
Zer was one of Lian's crushes and actually he was her ultimate crush only that at first,she didnt want it to prosper into something deeper because of Gino's warning. Zer was a man who could get any woman's attention without doing much effort.He has...