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Pen Your Pride

Missed... Again.

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After Ross calmed down and the redness disappeared from both of our faces. we decided to go out of his room. Ross didn't say anything to me after I saw him like that. Before we left the room he looked down at his hand and entwined our fingers together. He looked into my eyes as if asking if it was okay. I slightly smiled, reassuring him it was. We walked out and met everyone downstairs. It was now only six o'clock. 

"hey sweetie." Stormie said walking over. i had thought she was talking to Ross but when I looked up at her, she was looking directly at me. 

"oh... um.. yeah?" I tried smiling. 

"feeling better?" she asked. I nodded. "would you guys like to come to dinner with us? were getting ready now." She wondered. Ross looked at me for my answer. Maybe getting out and spending time with everyone would be good for me. 

"yeah. That sounds like fun."  I agreed to it. Stormie smiled and hugged me tightly. 

"they're going." Stormie yelled to everyone else, making me slightly jump. Rydel ran over. 

"come on. lets get you ready." She said grabbing my hand and dragging me up the stairs behind her. Ross' hand detached from mine and I laughed slightly. 

"hey!" he yelled at Delly. Del ran up to her room still dragging me behind. She sat me in her vanity chair and looked around her room. 

"Ah here!" she jumped excitedly. Del ran to her closet and handed me a pair of my old favorite jeans. I smiled. They were a light, faded blue with small tears by the knees. They fit me perfectly too. Well they did... I wasn't sure how they would fit now. I was starved for the longest time. I now look tiny compared to what I did. After I set them on my lap Del walked over with a light brown, long sleeve shirt in her hands. "this will look adorable." she smiled at me. I nodded and went to go change. I walked out of her bathroom and spun around for her. "yes! it looks great!!" she cheered. I didn't get to see how it really did look on me. 

"so... where exactly are we going for dinner?" I wondered. I was trying to break out of my shell. It wasn't working. I was still quiet, shy, and scared. I tried not to show it. 

"Mom told us not to tell you or Ross." she winked. I shuddered as she turned around. He use to wink before doing something horrid to me. I pushed the thought to the back of my mind. I didn't want to think about that tonight, or ever again. I nodded. Dell told me to sit in her pink vanity chair. So I did. "do you want to wear makeup? I don't want to make you if you don't want to." She wondered. 

"No. It's fine Del. Go ahead." I smiled. She clapped her hands with joy and took out her makeup. 

"after I'm done, you can look." She smiled, I nodded as she began to fix me. After about ten minutes she was finished. "done!" she giggled. "you look absolutely perfect!!" She screeched. I jumped and slightly laughed. "go look!" she said pulling me to my feet. I walked over to the mirror dreading to see what actually became of my body. I hven't looked into a full body mirror since the day we left for camp, which seemed so long ago. I walked over and looked at myself. I was expecting to see a hideous human staring back at me, one with a stick figure for a body, bruised hands, arms, neck, and face. When I looked at myself the make up covered the bruises on my neck and face. The cracks in my lips had disappeared and was replaced by shinny, smooth gloss. My eyes were shadowed from light to dark, the mascara topped it off. The blush made my cheeks look like I had color and was alive. as from before I looked as if I was dead. As for my outfit... it looked good, I was definitely a lot skinnier and it was very noticeable. My hip bones popped out so much. I hated it. But these jeans looked good on me still. I had bones for legs but the jeans made me look like I still had some weight. The shirt fit great. Aside from my stomach looking as if I was anorexic. The shirt was tight but made me feel comfortable. 

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