27 ~ When you Can't Sleep At Night

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Title Credit: Of Mice & Men

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@MaddieBTK: Q&A sesh, go! #askMBTK

 

@Nadiaritz: @maddiebtk #askmbtk how's it like touring with bands you loved long before your career?

 

@MaddieBTK: @Nadiaritz mind blowing. #askmbtk

 

@punxirwin: @maddiebtk #askmbtk you should get back together with Alex

 

@MaddieBTK: @punxirwin not a question, hun xx #askmbtk

 

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"Thank you everyone for coming out to this tour it’s been amazing! Love you guys! See you in two months!”

 

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Mid-January 

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I woke up with a huge headache, laying on Dylans bare chest. I’ve woken up like this way too many times. I slid off the bed and rubbed my face, walking into the bathroom. I looked myself in the mirror and sighed.

I don’t know who I was anymore.

Being an actually sort of big band right now was amazing. I felt like I was amazing. Everyone loved me. But I’ve always had a good sense of morality. I don’t like to admit it but I know what I’m doing is wrong.

Sex, Drugs, & Rock N Roll. It’s the truth. Dylan isn’t my boyfriend, if you were wondering. He is very good at what he does though.

He came into the bathroom and wrapped his arms around me as I checked my messages, kissing my neck. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” I mumbled, focusing on one message in particular.

“What’s up?” He looked over my shoulder.

“Do you wanna go to a wedding?”

“Who’s?”

“Rian and Cass’s. Old friends of mine. Why was I invited? Oh, well. Wanna go? Its right when we have that weeks break before going to the UK.”

“Sure, I’ll go. I look pretty sexy in a suit though, just a heads up.”

“Mmm, I bet you do.”

 

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“Jordan? You’re drinking?” I gaped. He had gotten over his own alcoholism a few years ago, and swore to never drink again. None of us had witnessed him take a single sip.

“Fuck it! I’m a fu-fucking Rockstar, who c-cares?” He slurred, the people around him cheered. I shrugged and got my own drink.

“What the hell.” Chris said quietly. I looked over and a group of girls were hounding him. “Girls please. No. I don’t- no. Please. You’re very nice but- please. Dear lord.”

None of them were listening. I stepped in and shooed them away. “He’s Asexual! Respect that shit!”

He sighed. “Thank you.”

“No problem dude. Keep working up your confidence. Speak up when you can.” I patted his back and waded through the crowd of random people and famous people until I got out of the bar. When I did I lit a cigarette, another new ‘habit’ of mine.

Then I got a call.

“Hello?” I answered.

“M-Maddie…”

“Who is this?”

They sniffed like they had been crying. It was a man. “Y-You don’t remember what I sound like? You used to say you’d know m-my voice over your parents.”

I paused for awhile. “Why are you calling me, Alex?”

“Don’t say that so harshly…”

“Why?”

“Cause if you hate me I just might [hiccup] die.”

“W-What do you mean by die?”

“I think you know. I just wanted to talk to you! Fuck I dropped my bottle. You’re worth it.”

“Look I know you’ve gotta be sad about the band but Alex that’s not the thing to do. I want you to go to bed, sober up in the morning.”

“Yes mom.”

“I mean it god damnit. Go to bed, sleep it off, get up in the morning and write a song.”

“A song?”

“Yes a song. Those things you’re so good at. Those help you.”

“That’s the thing. I can’t write songs. Not about how sad I am, not about you, not about my fucking dog.”

“Oh dear. Alex, please, this’ll pass. You can get past things like this.”

“Fucking prove it!” I heard something crash on his end. “Prove something’s gonna get better. Without you, without the band. When are things gonna get better? When will I stop wanting to crawl up in a ball and stop existing?”

“Breath Alex.”

“Breath? That’s all you’re telling me?”

“You’re having a panic attack, you’ve gotta breath.”

“I-I can’t!” He cried.

“Shh, it’s okay, you’ll be okay. I’m here. Remember how we used to help these? Let’s do that again.” I cleared my throat and sang to him. “Here in this world I’m awaked with mistakes, but it's love that keeps fueling me. Fueling me... Pretty little lady with the swollen eyes, would you show them to me?

 

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@AlexAllTimeLow: Sorry I’ve been gone for so long. I feel much better now.

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 A/N:

I'm thinking about wrapping the story up soon. I just planned out a decent ending in my mind, although I wanted it to be much longer.

Sorry!

SIX COMMENTS TWENTY FOUR VOTES FOR A NEW CHAPTER! I mean six different people guys

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