Selenophilia

Fifty Three

Elise loathed what she had been given.

Elise wondered, for a short amount of time,  what she had done wrong in life. She must have done something to be given this amount of grief and sadness.

What had she done to deserve this? Did she do something? Say something? What did she do to deserve this pain, to deserve this tears, to deserve the scars, the family, Cleo.

And Hugo.

What had she done to deserve living this life and living in a life where you found a place where you finally belong but was going to be gone in a matter of time?

Some part of herself blames herself for getting Hugo killed, because let's face it, why did the boy die in the first place? It wasn't because he tripped and fell, right? It wasn't because he was stupid enough to get himself killed. It wasn't because he was incapable of surviving. Hugo was more than capable.

He had the chance to live.

He had the chance to go out and live his life and die in a proper place. He deserved to live. He deserved to fight for his own, to choose his own decisions, to be a proper adult, to love someone, to care for someone.

He didn't deserve to die in a bed filled with flowers with only the setting sun saying goodbye to him.

And Elise knows that it was his choice. Damn it, she knows that. Hugo was someone who could choose his own battles and he chose one to save her. She knows that.

But that doesn't make Elise feel any better.

He died for her. Hugo, her sweetest most understanding first friend, died. Because of who?

Who made him run through a forest just to get somebody safe because that person was too useless to do something? Who made him become a wall to protect someone? Who made him say goodbye? Who made him look at her with this sad fucking eyes, with tears blurring his vision, with a smile, with a sweet most genuine smile that Elise had ever seen?

Elise saw that sad smile. It was plastered on his face as the sun was setting. The gentle cold breeze caressed his white skin, causing his cheeks to redden at the bitter cold. Flowers of different smell and colors surrounded them, causing an epitome of ethereal beauty of scenery.

Who made him smile like that?

Who was that person?

Elise.

Who caused a war? A war, for them was when balance was broken. A balance that wasn't meant to be touched. If one human didn't survive the forest then the balance would have still been there, right? Peace would have still been alive. Marielle wouldn't have to choose between her mate and Elise.

And damn it.

Marielle had to choose, that much was so true and clear.

Selenophiles only have one chance at having mates. Unlike, wolves who could have second chances, selenophiles doesn't have that kind of luxury.

She had one shot at having a mate and she blew it.

For who?

For Elise.

For Elise. For Elise. For Elise that. For Elise this. Save Elise this. Save Elise that. I care for you, Elise. Yo are my source of happiness, Elise. Forelsket. Darling. Hun. I want you to survive.

I want you to live, Elise.

____
Elise was surprised when Hugo was there at her willow tree with a dazed look on his face.