Rolling Girl: One Shot

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How much more pain do I have to go through, it hurts. No matter how much I scream I cannot fight back. I attempt to get rid of the voices in my head but they sink into your brain, no matter how much I roll. They won’t go away.

“I’m fine” I muttered to myself, not understanding my situation. I had cuts and bruises all over my body. My breathing was scattered and my heart felt heavy. How much longer can I live like this?

Over the years I have made mistakes over and over again. After losing everything, I was lost. My family was gone. Left alone in this world, these tears I hide but really they are pricking my fragile heart.  Yet still, I roll towards nothing. A hand pulled me back, a man…one of my teachers to be precise. His hands warm, too warm. I try to run but I am trapped.

I screamed. “One more time, just let me roll, I will stop soon” He seems anxious but let me go, I ran into the distance. Not turning back to see the face he was making.  But I cannot stop, not after everything. I have been called names, hurt and injured. This was how I get rid of that pain, rolling into nothing.

These voices torture everything I do, trapped in a cage of my own mind. I repeat that I am fine, over and over again. However the pain quickly caught up, until I fell.  I was bruised in every place I can see, patches formed over my body to reveal a helpless girl who couldn’t stop until her body couldn’t take it.

“One more time, just a little more” I mumbled under my breath. I was on the ground through, I couldn’t roll. Suddenly I felt my lift up, them warm hands from before were tied around my waist.

“One more time you said, and yet you are here lying on the ground, please Miku stop” His voice gentle as he lifted my fringe from my face. Wanting to cry I covered my eyes with the torn sleeve of my jumper and wailed, as high as I could and as loud.  He pulled me into a hug, shocked I had lost any purpose to speak.

“Thank you” I whispered in his ear, with that I decided to restart. No more rolling, no more hiding the pain. 

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