I couldn't believe that Jayleigh had asked me to leave. I wanted to be there to support her, and protect her. I did as she asked, and left, even though I didn't want to. I knew Ellie was a dangerous person so I called the cops, just in case. If I wasn't able to protect her I needed someone to have my back. When the cops arrived I asked them to wait with me until she needed help. When I heard Jayleigh scream, all the feelings of losing her came rushing back all at once. I ran as fast as I could into the room and seeing her un-harmed suddenly took those worries away. I quickly held her to comfort her, I will always be here for her, no matter what. I couldn't believe what we had just witnessed I couldn't believe Jayleigh's dad would do something like that, what on earth was he thinking? But then again, Ellie has her ways of getting into people's heads...
I will never forget how she used me.
I just sat there and held Jayleigh in my arms. I didn't know what to do so decided on what my heart felt was the right thing to do. And before I knew it, I was singing, in a slow-whispery tone into her ear... "Don't you worry Cause Everything's gonna be alright, ai-ai-ai-aight, Be alright, ai-ai-ai-aight -through the sorrow, and the fights, don't you worry, cause everything's gonna be alright,ai-ai-ai-aight...be alright,ai-ai-ai-aight.." I sang, touching her ear now and again with my lip so she could feel me. Jayleigh just looked up at me, not taking her eyes of me once, as I continued to let my heart pour out all of its love for her through the words of my song...
Her eyes were beginning to tear up as she squeezed my shirt with her fist, sobbing into my chest. I cradled her further with my arms as I watched the police take Ellie away, out of the house. She takes her face out of my chest, slowely and looks up at me with teary, red and tired eyes... "She's not going to stop until she knows I'm dead." She says to me. "Baby we'll figure something out, I promise" I reply as the horrifying thought of Jayleigh being dead travels through me.
I shiver then tense.
Trying to change the subject for both her sake and mine, I say: "Let's go clean up, sweetheart." I stand up, still holding Jayleigh in my arms as I take her upstairs to the bedroom and sit her down onto the bed. "I'll be up in a second baby, I promise, I just need to talk to the officers" I say, kissing her on the forehead before I walk out. I walk down the stairs and onto the front porch of the house where I find an officer waiting to talk to me. He stands, and welcomes me.
I explain everything to him; from the threats to the abuse...everything. Making sure I get it all off, of my chest. By the end of explaining everything to him, I'm positive I haven't missed anything out when the thought of hope and freedom suddenly pops into my head...
Ellie is gone, we can finally live our lives...
I was still in distress as everything that had happened in the past, what feels like an eternity, races through my head, round and round, like a never ending road to hell. I don't know what to do, I just don't... Suddenly I realise that I haven't cut myself in a very long time, and oh what I would do to pick up a blade right now and skim it through, pass my veins...yes...and this time, I won't stop halfway.
I crave for the feeling. But I can't, it's wrong and I promised Justin.
I put my hands in my head then look up as I try to dismiss the thought, it's impossible to forget. I turn my eyes to the bedside tabIe and decide to open the drawer, just out of curiosity when I spot one of Justin's sharp, deluxe razor blades inside. I take one out of the packet. Using my nails, I squeeze and pinch out one of the 3 blades on the razor. It was indeed very sharp! "Good...I mean bad", I thought to myself. I hold the blade on the tips of my index finger and thumb. Slowely I roll up my sleeve, noticing all the previous scars of suicide attempts, and pain and take a deep breath. This was it, no more pain, no more Ellie...no more life. I bring the blade to my wrist, resting it gently on my skin. It was cold and I felt a shiver travel down my spine.
I close my eyes,
take a deep breath,
and grip the blade harder.
I was ready, my nerves were pulsing, adrenlaine was rushing through my body like an electric shock, it was the perfect moment...3...2..1..
"JAYLEIGH!" I hear a voice scream but it was too late, I had already made an insition into my skin, blood was flowing out of my wrist like a river and the weird thing was, I liked it. Without thinking, I slit myself another time before a firm hand gripped the blade out of my hand, throwing it to the floor. I look up and see Justin's worried face, which seemed to be fading.
I smile at him. He's so pure, kind, gentle with no guilty concsious or bad deeds. Oh what has he seen in a trampy, ugly and pathetic excuse for a girl like me? I'm a slut, let's face it. All I've done my whole life is have sex, I haven't got a job, I didn't study...I couldn't - Jake never let me but that's besides the point. I'm useless, I'm worth nothing in this world, to myself and to be honest...Justin. I'm a fucking wrecking ball that needs to be demolished before it causes anymore damage to anyone.
"Let go of this life Jayleigh, just let it go..." I say to myself, looking up at Justin's faint shadow as my eyes begin to close.
*END OF CHAPTER*
If anyone is suffering or has suffered from any of the problems that Jayleigh is going through in this book, please feel free and confident to contact me directly for help. Even if any of the problems are not listed in the story, please do not hesitate to contact me as I will still be able to help you and guide you through any problem you may have. Also, be rest assured that what you discuss with me will be private and confidential in order to aid you. I take these matters (some of which have been mentioned previously in the story) very seriously and would not want anyone to have to go through them alone, especially now with all the stress that is having to be faced (exams etc.). My Instagram account is: JustinIsTyping - there you will be able to direct message me in complete assurance that it will be me and only me who reads those messages.
You are not alone, we're all here to support you...I am and so is Justin :)
P.S. Hope you enjoyed the chapter, more to come #soon
Love BieberPad (@JustinIsTyping),
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***DEDICATED TO JUSTIN'S BELIEBERS*** A few comments from the readers: "A seriously must-read story..." - "Officially the best fan-fiction, I've ever read!" - "Once you start reading, you won't stop!" *Please note that the story may contain some sex...