october 5, 1922

56 1 0
                                    

47 days

"How would you feel about becoming an ambassador to Amestris?"

Lan Fan blinks. "Now, my lord?"

"I don't know," he says, not even looking up from his paperwork. "Soon. Within the year."

"My lord, are you angry with me?" She worries, that even after her years of service to the Emperor, he's still found reason to dismiss her.

"Of course not," he replies immediately, snapping quickly to attention. He turns to where she stands beside him, all familiar lightness gone from his expression. She rarely sees this face on him, and it's rarely directed at her; the last time she saw it, he was sawing her arm off with his own blade, angry and distraught and despairing. "Of course I'm not." His tone is firm, and Lan Fan is inclined to believe him. "I just- you're a people person, are you not?"

"You mark me wrong," she says, restraining a laugh. He knows as well as she does of the enemies she made in Amestris; the noblewomen and fellow guards of Xing that'd like to have her head on a silver platter. "I'm not much of a diplomat, my lord." He knows that. How could he not? Surely, he's kidding- running her around to stress her out for his own amusement.

"Hm." If he's playing a joke on her, he seems unamused by it. "I'll have to find somewhere else, then," he mutters.

"Are you reassigning me?"

Ling sighs, his pen stilling as he seems to turn words over in his mouth. "Not that I want to. I just think you..." He trails off. "I think you have talents that could be used elsewhere. Maybe not... not as a diplomat, but-"

"I don't understand."

"You're too gifted to be stuck in service to me all your life. You've already lost enough," he says, his gaze flicking from her automail to her mask.

"It's an honor to serve my Emperor," she replies automatically, mechanically; it is a phrase she's been taught since birth, engrained into her for decades. The words are as immediate as breathing. "I've been your servant as long as I can remember, and I don't see why that should need to change."

"This loyalty could-..." He doesn't finish his sentence. His qi, unrestful and blue, betrays his the ending. Lan Fan worries.

"My lord, are you-?"

"Wouldn't you rather be promoted?" he interrupts. "Become a general? Your strategy is impeccable-"

"For me, it is. Myself." Her fists clench at her sides. "I was trained to be unpredictable, and to sacrifice my own body to save others. I would not let a soldier die on my watch, and I only have one life to give."

"So you do," he assents, the understanding of her mortality weighing heavily on him, in a way that it has never affected her. "You do. It's only that-"

"I don't like this," she says plainly, turning away from him with finality. He falls silent, teetering on the edge of sulking. She continues once she's regained her composure. "I will serve you as long as you live, and I will serve your wife. I will train and guard your children. Once all of my work is done, I will die an old servant, as my grandfather did before me." She purses her lips and frowns at him. "That is my life's plan, and should you change my department, I will never forgive you for ruining it." Belatedly, she tacks on a "My lord."

He smiles fondly, but it's tinged with something that Lan Fan does not recognize. "Of course. I'm sorry for troubling you, Lan Fan."

"Yes. Well." She looks away from him, locking her hands together to hide her discomfort.

He does not breach the subject again.

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