EIGHTEEN

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this is a long chapter so buckle up, get comfy and please vote and comment!
TW: substance abuse, family abuse, drug problems, vomiting.

Harry awoke from his sleep from a brutal thud on his pelvis, followed by the sound of projectile vomiting and he instantly opened his eyes and saw Katya with her head deep into the toilet bowl.

He groaned lightly as he held onto his crushed groin, the pain resulting from Katya quickly jumping out of the bed, climbing over Harry's body and running to make it to the toilet in expert time.

The sound of vomiting in the silent apartment was horrific and as Katya struggled to keep her eyes open, struggling to breathe and hold onto the toilet bowl she felt a gentle hand on her back and instantly felt comforted.

Harry held her hair back, despite how short it already was, as she continued to vomit with tears streaming down her face but the rubbing hand on her back could've healed her from anything.

After a few minutes she managed to catch her breath and Harry handed her a glass of water that he had quickly poured with a soft smile, despite her slight embarrassment over the entire situation.

"Are you nearly finished-"

Harry's question was interrupted by the sound of Katya vomiting again and even though in another situation that would've been inherently comical he just felt so incredibly sad for Katya, continuously rubbing her back again until she was finally finished.

She slunk onto her ass and looked up at him sadly, mascara residue streaming down her face and her eyes so red and puffy that she looked like a completely broken person.

"As much as I don't endorse what happened last night I feel like right now is not a good time to lecture," Harry started, his voice softer than what she had expected.

"No, it's the perfect time to tell me that I'm killing myself because maybe if I hear it from you I'll actually listen."

Her words rang through the silent apartment, replaying continuously in Harry's mind as her words had clarified that she genuinely recognised her flaws and cared about his approval.

It was also weird to hear her voice sound full again after he had seen her so lifeless and weak merely hours before.

"I'm not good with being vulnerable," Katya whispered, desperately trying to read Harry's expression and feeling tremendous guilt for the dark circles under his eyes that were due to her actions.

Harry shook his head and pointed at her endless drawings and paintings that clearly conveyed her vulnerability and she managed to smile, knowing that he had correctly faulted her.

"I'm not good with being vulnerable through my words," Katya corrected softly, roughly wiping her mouth and Harry nodded, focused on watching her movements that just seemed so overly animated even though he knew that they weren't and that he was just visualising her contrasting lifeless body that had scarred his mind.

Watching someone you love destroy themselves was something that Harry had never even considered but now he was living that reality and it was slowly progressing into his greatest fear.

Katya looked like she wanted to speak but Harry offered her a reassuring nod that said 'we will talk later' and he quickly walked to the small cabinet and began to make tea and toast.

It all felt so strangely domestic and Katya was surprised that she didn't feel stifled or want to get up and run.
She felt weirdly content even though she knew that she would have to talk openly with Harry and that in a matter of hours Louis would be banging down her door to shout at her.
She couldn't blame him though.

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Jan 11, 2021 ⏰

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