A Year with Sqampy

Chapter 12

AN- Happy Super Bowl! And guys!! 3k reads!!! Loves it!!!! Thank you so much!!! Love y'all!!!<3

Sqaishey POV

I shifted in my bed, and fluttered my eyes open. I saw the white bandages stained red around my wrists, and last night's events came rushing back. I rolled over so I am on my back and covered my face with my hands, trying to figure out what happened last night. Of course I knew that I had a panic attack and Stampy was really sweet and comforted me, but I have no clue why. He never lost patience with me, and when I cut, he came and stopped me right away. I really need to thank him. Sighing, I realized Stampy probably does not want to go on a date with me anymore, and frankly, that might be best. Hunter won't have a reason to hurt him. I am a little disappointed though. I did want to go on a date with a sweet... funny... handsome guy...

Slightly depressed, I pulled myself out of bed and walked to the bathroom. I needed to change my bandages and clean the bathroom up after the mess I made. When I opened the door I could see a lot of blood on the floor, and my bloody blades on the opposite side of the room from when Stampy knocked them out of my hand. I grabbed the blades and placed them on the sink, then started cleaning up the blood. Once I was done, I cleaned off my blades and put them away. I knew Stampy would be mad, but I would need them again with Hunter in my life. I opened the cabinet and grabbed some more bandages and some other medical stuff before unwrapping my arms. My skin is all pink, and covered in white lines representing my many past cuts. The new ones are still leaking a little blood that I rinsed off before doing what I need to do.

Once my arms were wrapped up again, I shuffled out of my room and down the hall. Stampy was standing in the kitchen, making 2 cups of tea. Stampy glanced up and saw me there, then waved me over with a smile. I walked over to him, and Stampy pulled me into a hug. "You feeling better ducky?" Stampy asked, and I nodded before pulling out of the hug. "Here, I made you some tea." he said, handing me a mug. I smiled weakly in reply and accepted the mug. I took a sip of the warm tea as Stampy and I stood there in an awkward silence.

After a minute, I grew sick of the silence so I said "Sorry for ruining our date Stampy." Stampy winced slightly, but smiled at me and said "Sqaishey don't blame yourself. It's not your fault Hunter is so horrible." "And thank you for not getting mad when I...you know..." I trailed off, running my fingers over the bandages. "Of course Sqaishey" Stampy said, taking my hand. "Will you just promise me you won't do it again?" he said and I nodded. Cutting is bad and I need to stop. "Can we try that date again tonight?" I suddenly blurted out from nowhere. "I would love to Sqaishey, but you are technically still with Hunter. I don't want him to hurt you because of me." Stampy asked, a look in his eyes I can't quite figure out. It was part sad, part disappointed, and part something else. "If I promise that I am going to break up with him when he gets home from Africa, can we?" I asked Stampy, looking at the ground. "I can't ask you to basically give up your dream for me, but I do think you should escape the abuse." Stampy murmured, running his thumb back and forth across the top of my hand. "I do need to break up with him before I get hurt even more. I guess I will find another way to be a singer" I said, then sighed, looking at the ground. Stampy stepped closer, snaking his arm around my waist and lifting up my chin gently with the other hand. "I will help you become a singer Sqaishey, and if you're sure, I guess we can go on that date." Stampy said, smiling at me. I set my mug back on the counter and wrapped my arms around myself, and stared down at the ground, starting to feel a little self-conscious. I looked back up at Stampy and realized our foreheads were almost touching. Stampy noticed as well, and we both blushed, then I pulled away. Stampy looked down and rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed, and said "I'll guess you should go get ready." I nodded, and walked down the hall confused. It seemed like Stampy was going to kiss me, and I don't know why. I'm not special, I'm just messed up. Ugh, why is this so confusing?