About

About me you ask?
      Ah! What a change from the past!
      Cuz this world has barely any class.
      
      I like raindrops and morning dew.
      Why? I have no clue.
      Many dragons I have slew,
      with my bare hands, may I add too.
      
      I adore the color green.
      Though it might just be a phase of teens-
      Just as skinny jeans
      and the urge to be lean.
      
      I hate dresses.
      They're just messes.
      Maybe if the were red-ish,
      but that going off guesses.
      
      Chocolate, I can't stand
      "Why?!" You demand.
      It's hard to understand.
      
      Puppies I adore,
      I can't resist their allure.
      I have three, but want more.
      But, alas! I'm too poor.
      
      Lettuce is good.
      Eat it as a snack, I would,
      Just sneak it under my hood.
      
      So inconstant this is.
      But that's what makes me Liz.
       
      By the way:
      
      Roses are red. 
      Violets are blue.
      This really sucks,
      So it's going into the loo. 
      
      Yeah, I'm not a good poet.
      And yeah, I love AVPM and AVPS
      
      When do I update?
      Please don't hate,
      but I don't have certain dates.
      I wait until my ideas are great.
      
      This is my lame way of saying I don't know when I update. I can't force myself to write, but I tend to update most commonly on weekends about every two weeks.
      
      Please send banners or covers or any burning questions about my story to my Wattpad email: notpresent7@gmail.com.
      Don't you just hate it when you have to add random numbers to an email you want and then it just ruins the whole thing?
  • Location:
    Wouldn't you like to know?
  • Joined:
    4 years ago

Reading Lists

Favorites
5 stories
PFS Competition
28 stories

3 Published Works

Featured work.

Project Fat Suit

Social data: 21.7M reads. 351K votes. 165K comments.

Description: Serena Davidson leads two lives. At school, she's a morbidly obese, stupid, nerdy, bitchy, slutty, and a teacher's pet. But at home she's the scrawny vegetarian pushover. What would possess someone to wear a fat suit every day? And what happens when...


Other Works by not_present.
One Shots

One Shots

16.2K 363 82

A collection of short stories that may or not make logical sense. Anyways, enjoy :)

Kidnapped for a Fancy Teapot?

Kidnapped for a Fancy Teapot?

22.6K 462 198

Evangeline Jones's life revolves around her parents' antique shop. Someone breaks in the middle of the n...

Why haven't you updated PFS in nearly a year? Are you alright? I don't mind waiting but at least give us some sign that you're here...just something. I hope you're alright. 
Tropicalum8 posted a message to not_present
I think I'll die if you don't finish PFS. It's probably one of the best novels I've read on wattpad, and that's saying a lot considering I'm really picky. I hope you're okay and doing well, I know we all miss you. You're hilarious and an amazing writer! xx(: