very very interesting beginning, dynamic descriptions and a style you cannot get bored of. voted
I read stories like this but this one was really great! Better than those I read before :D I voted it! ^^
This part was just undetailed, but yet the grammar are basic, less mistakes. You need more practice in punctuation.
this chapter was wild.. really liked reading it.. your descriptions are really clear and it's got a unique concept.. good job.. :)
This is a very good chapter. Your descriptions are very vivid! It kept me very interested! Keep it up!
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