@AlwaysDramione No problem, you can take a critic, that's good. :) The Idea is great, though!
I like it, but it's moving a bit too quickly. Maybe a little fight in the cupboard or something could spice it up a bit.
That's pretty good. It got my attention (although the end made me a little uncomfortable, it was still pretty awesome).
Add to your private library
My LibraryAdd this story to your public reading lists