I Give Long, Detailed Critiques. Closed.
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_Cutelilgem
Joined: 2012-08-10Posts: 679 months ago@Lclaire done with yours :)
@JessCanFlyy yours too. actually, it's already okay, though there are a few errors most readers won't spot.
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JessCanFlyy
Joined: 2012-03-13Posts: 1659 months ago@Cutelilgem Thank you. (: Yeah, I guessed there would be, I didn't edit most of it... :L
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MarilynsBabyDoll
Joined: 2012-07-02Posts: 959 months agohttp://www.wattpad.com/6438282-ricky-summers-live-to-infinity Here is mine! Thanks if you'll read it! xxx
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Gothickk
Joined: 2012-08-06Posts: 259 months ago@Cutelilgem Plz plz plz read mine! This is my first book and wud appreciate if you wud read it :) Its a vamp book but nothings scary in it so far.... I wud appreciate it if u cud critique it and spread the word bout it :) Its called The chosen one....(Not official title) ------------------------------- Beig a normal kid sucks according to Valkaira, but after a bunch vampyrs find her, she finds something that suck even more, being a chosen one...
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_CutelilgemJoined: 2012-08-10Posts: 679 months ago
@JessCanFlyy you can spend this time editing, since you're done with the book. if you're lucky, a publisher prowling round on wattpad might take interest. it's a good book. i didn't really know it was a fanfic til i saw the word fanfic in the title...somewhere in between the story. XD
@Cat_Loves_1D @Gothickk, done with yours. don't lost hope. I'm sorry, i normally point out more bad points than good. :(
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_SomeGirl
Joined: 2010-09-28Posts: 5339 months ago@Cutelilgem I'm checking out your sister's work now.
I have a novel in progress called Beasts of Prey. It's a mixture of Action/Mystery (though I might be changing it to Mystery/Thriller), and so far I have only uploaded two chapters. Here's the blurb:
"The greatest assassin in the world never fails, never gets caught, never falters. Today, the greatest assassin in the world has been discovered."
I have rated it as a PG-13 because the characters do swear, and there is violence, but there is nothing too bad in there. However, in a later chapter there will be quite a strong sex scene, so when I publish that part I will probably be bumping it up to an R-rating - just a heads up in case you decide that you'd like to read more.
http://www.wattpad.com/story/1697003-beasts-of-prey
Thank you for your time, and I hope you enjoy my novel!
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MichaelAndreoni
Joined: 2012-08-16Posts: 19 months agohttp://www.wattpad.com/6557957-consolidated-freight
I don't know if you're interested in giving a read to some pretentious literary stuff, but your opinion would be appreciated. Thanks!
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KurisutaruRivaa
Joined: 2012-08-15Posts: 5919 months agoHi, I'm new here! I just published my story yesterday!! My story is a rather short one, only ten-paged long.
http://www.wattpad.com/story/1914170-shrinking-universe-watty-awards-2012
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Colecoke
Joined: 2012-06-11Posts: 5139 months agoMine's a horror/short story. Do you critique those? If you do, please look at this link! Thank you!:) http://www.wattpad.com/6558958-the-murder-of-my-hand It's about a girl who face retaliation from her mother after she got accepted into a prestigious overseas music school. Thanks:) Oh, before I forgot, it's pretty short, only 3 pages long. Thanks a bazillion times. Haha. :)
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_deathispeacefulxxx
Joined: 2012-05-15Posts: 299 months ago@Cutelilgem Hey! I really need to know if my story is good enough! Here's the link - http://www.wattpad.com/story/1355532-heart-of-vengeance Thanks!
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michaelgoffus1
Joined: 2012-07-19Posts: 2079 months agohttp://www.wattpad.com/story/1723617-fight-back One group of kids running from their past, but when they finally think they've gotten away, their safe life is flipped around. They can only run and hide, but they're always found. As they run, they hear news of something that will change their life forever, along with the rest of the world. It seems inevitable to escape, but is it? Are they going to start over, and return to where they started? They only have one choice: fight back.
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RLeighGale
Joined: 2012-02-28Posts: 2709 months ago -
_football_fan
Joined: 2012-04-22Posts: 2369 months ago@Cutelilgem please do have a look at my friends story.
http://www.wattpad.com/3426606-achieving-your-goals-watty-awards-2012-chapter-one
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a_aaron
Joined: 2012-07-16Posts: 1989 months agohttp://www.wattpad.com/story/1695224-coinholder-part-1
It's no secret Cassie's mum is struggling to bring up her and her little sister Bo single handedly, so when Cassie receives an unexpected fully paid scholarship she can't bring herself to turn it down - no matter how much she wants to. But Cassie get's more than she bargained for when she arrives at her new school. She finds herself in the centre of a world she never even knew existed, with powers she doesn't fully understand, and it seems that all hope of peace among the elemental Coinholders has been pinned upon her shoulders. There's only one thing Cassie knows for certain - she can't do it alone. But who does she trust in a world where emotion can be manipulated, feelings can be controlled and thoughts can be tampered with?
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_heyitsholland
Joined: 2011-07-23Posts: 3809 months agoLooking for ways to improve before I get my next chapter up.
****
Oliver Ashford. Hope St. James.
They weren't friends.
They weren't lovers.
But towards the end, they kind of had something special.
Then she was gone.
She was gone and Oli couldn't sleep at night.
She was gone and no other girl could compare.
She was gone and everything was falling apart.
Oli had to bring her back.
Oli had to raise the dead.
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AngelaWrite
Joined: 2012-02-27Posts: 1349 months ago@Cutelilgem Please critique my story. I want all the help I can get.
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caroline52197
Joined: 2012-02-23Posts: 5589 months ago -
ElisePerson
Joined: 2011-08-18Posts: 1059 months ago -
_CutelilgemJoined: 2012-08-10Posts: 679 months ago
@SomeGirl @MichaelAndreoni @Colecoke @KurisutaruRivaa Done with yours. Good luck in your writing career! Don't give up, no matter what!
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ColecokeJoined: 2012-06-11Posts: 5139 months ago
@Cutelilgem Thank you! I will look through the comments soon. Thanks again:)
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YinYang
Joined: 2011-08-28Posts: 4749 months agoSo...whenever you have the time.....this is a thriller with a little bit of every genre mainly revolving around a woman who has just found she is a shape-shifter and that her whole past was a lie, do NOT judge me on grammar and punctuation, you have no idea how hectic my life has been recently and I JUST got a new laptop....as in TODAY....and it's almost two in the morning here so I gotta catch me some winks xD But I will edit with the grammar and punctuation ASAP but in the meantime, here it is: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1817416-serpentiels-new-chapter-every-tuesday-and-saturday
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_CutelilgemJoined: 2012-08-10Posts: 678 months ago
@michaelgoffus1 @RLeighGale @football_fan @anna_aaron @heyitsholland @book_worm_8 done with yours. keep on writing!
@caroline52197 @ElisePerson @YinYang : I'm sorry that your wait might go past two days, is it okay if i leave your books for later? i have my classes, but i'll go back to them ASAP. sorry for the delay!
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_deathispeacefulxxxJoined: 2012-05-15Posts: 298 months ago
@Cutelilgem Hey! I didn't get my review yet!
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DragonButterFly
Joined: 2012-07-05Posts: 208 months agoso i jst wrote this a few days ago n id REEAALLY like some criticism on it :33
It's my first time writing a vampire story, so i just wanted to see how it's going from a reader's point of view :33
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LouisArchieDreyfus
Joined: 2012-05-13Posts: 1508 months agohttp://www.wattpad.com/story/1748600-tres
When Anrhu woke up to discover that the world that he knew was gone, and that creatures from his native mythology; both good and monsters were real, he knew he must quest for the prophecy that will release his world and destroy the unseen entity that controlled the nightmare that has become his reality.
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