Surfacing - Book One in the Swans Landing Series

Chapter 37

Chapter Thirty-Seven

My hands shook when I knocked on the front door of the deteriorating house. The sun had already begun to climb high in the orange-blue sky and it would be a beautiful Saturday in early March. People were outside already, getting ready for the day ahead.

But the little house looked empty and sad, a little lonelier than it had before. I shivered slightly, though I wasn’t sure why.

Mrs. Canavan’s expression turned fierce when she saw me. “Isn’t it bad enough that you took my son away?” she growled. “Now you’re harassing me at my home?”

I blinked at her. “I didn’t take your son away.”

Mrs. Canavan opened the door wider and flailed her arm toward the silent house behind her. “He’s gone, isn’t he? He left early this morning because of your kind. I knew you were trying to steal him away all along. He’s filth, just like his father. Get off my property before I call the police.”

The door slammed in my face, leaving me staring at my reflection in the broken glass.

Josh was gone? I stumbled down the steps, wondering what Mrs. Canavan had meant. We hadn’t had a chance to talk the night before. Lake had led me straight home after the confrontation and I’d gone to bed exhausted.

Understanding washed over me. Of course. His mom didn’t like it that he’d told everyone the truth about his heritage. So he’d probably left to give her some time to get over it.

And where else would he go?

My bike raced across the island, my feet pedaling at rapid speed toward the little parking lot at Pirate’s Cove. I skidded to a stop, letting my bike fall to the ground as I jumped off. Anyone inside the woods would have heard my approach with all the noise I made running down the path toward the beach. I had to get to Josh. I didn’t know what we would do now that he couldn’t go back home, but we would figure it out. Together.

I’d been wrong before. There were many reasons for me to stay in Swans Landing. I belonged here, and Josh and I could have a lifetime on the island to figure everything out.

The wind through the trees overhead sang a sighing song as I rushed forward, pushing past the low-hanging branches. A squirrel chattered happily somewhere above me and birds called out, as if announcing my arrival and assuring me that everything would be okay. My face cracked into a wide smile as I broke through the trees to the sand along the little hidden beach.

But our beach was empty.

“Josh?” I asked. No clothes lay on the beach to indicate he had gone swimming. The calm water gently lapped on the shore around the feet of the birds that searched for food in the surf.

Halfway down the beach I found a long, narrow box sitting in the sand. I knelt in front of it, running my hands over the surface. After a moment, I opened the lid. Inside was my camera, which I’d left at Josh’s house that day his mom threw the glass at my head.

There was a note with a few words scrawled on it in a small, blocky handwriting.

You have a million more pictures to take and a life worth living on land. - Josh

Underneath, there was a picture of the ocean made entirely of seashells. The little figure of the woman carrying the baby still walked along the shoreline, frozen in place.

I sat down in the sand, my gaze scanning the horizon, as if maybe I could look hard enough to find him out there. But the water remained empty except for a few birds bobbing on the surface.

He wasn’t here.

I remained sitting on the sand, my eyes locked on the distant horizon and my arms curled tight around my knees for a long time. I didn’t even notice the person who had sat down next to me until he spoke.

“I thought I might find you here.”

I turned, blinking at Dylan. He didn’t look at me as the wind whipped his hair into his face. He traced his fingers through the sand, letting the golden grains sift through them.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

He shrugged. “I’ve been up for hours. Didn’t sleep well last night.”

My stomach twisted painfully at the hurt in his tone. “Dylan, I’m so sorry,” I whispered. “The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you.”

“I know,” he said. “I think maybe all along I knew you didn’t feel the same way I did, but I didn’t want to admit it. I kept thinking that maybe I could be good enough to make you forget him.”

I shook my head, blinking away the stinging tears. “It’s not that you aren’t good enough.”

Dylan lifted his gaze to meet mine and I saw how sad his pale blue eyes were. “It’s that you love him,” he said.

I nodded.

He turned his face back toward the ocean, where dolphins jumped among the rippling waves far off shore. He looked so small and lonely, though we were only separated by a few inches.

“But did you ever really give me a chance?” he asked.

I dragged my fingers through the sand around me. “I’m not sure what you want me to say, Dylan. Do I care about you? Yes, but probably not the way you want. But do I think you really love me? I don’t know that you really know me.”

His eyes flashed, but I held up a hand to silence him. “You’ve wanted me to fit into your life, where everything is good. You’ve wanted me to see Lake as you see him, this guy who can do no wrong. You pretend the bad things don’t exist if you don’t talk about them. I’m not perfect, and Josh has always seen me for who I am.”

Dylan’s lips pressed together into a tight white line. “Forget it.” He stood, brushing sand from his jeans. “I’m going back home. You coming?”

“No,” I said, looking back at the water again. I wasn’t ready to give up hope yet. “I’m going to stay here a while longer.”

* * *

When I finally left Pirate’s Cove hours later, I spotted Miss Gale walking along the road ahead of me. At first, I didn’t recognize her because she walked slowly, her shoulders stooped over and she looked much older than she ever had before.

“Miss Gale?” I asked as I fell into step next to her.

She looked at me with red-rimmed eyes. “Oh, Mara,” she said, her voice croaking. “How…how are you, sugar?”

“Miss Gale,” I said, taking her arm. “What’s happened? Are you okay?”

Her face creased into a deep frown and she shook her head. “Sailor’s gone.”

Tingles raced up my spine and across my scalp. “What do you mean, gone? Where did she go?”

She gestured vaguely in the direction of the water. “Out there somewhere,” she said. “I tried to talk sense into her, to convince her to stay at least until the end of the school year. But she said she had to go now. She’s been talking about finding her mama for so long, but I never thought she’d actually leave.”

Something twisted in my stomach. “Did she go alone?”

“No,” Miss Gale told me, squeezing my hand. I knew the words she was about to say before she said them and I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that maybe this was a nightmare and I’d wake up soon.

But it wasn’t.

Miss Gale’s voice was soft when she said, “Josh Canavan went with her.”