A Christmas Phenomenon

Snowfall

Tortured by the thought she might have waited too long to tell anyone about what was happening to her, she paced her room; frantically muttering to herself, until gone midnight.

She continued like this for some time; pacing back and forth for about an hour before stopping in the middle of her room, completely still, not even daring to breathe. All she could hear was a distant hum from the street below; playing repeatedly like a broken record.

She caught sight of her light blue woollen jumper lying crumpled on the floor next to her bed, and picked it up tentatively as her room was crawling with several house spiders.

She took her jumper, attempted to straighten all the creases out and squeezed into it. It was ice cold and made her shiver convulsively, but at least it would keep her warm until she could pay the gas bill.

She reluctantly traipsed over to her tattered dresser and stared blankly at her own reflection in the mirror which was hanging just above it.

You could tell she had thrown fairy lights over the mirror in a mild panic to make the hell hole she lived in more like 'home'.

She stared into the unfamiliar eyes in which she had once called her own and with one hand pulled at her cheeks opening up her sleep ridden eyes to the wintery weather which seemed to have creeped into her cold apartment.

The apartment is tearing at the seams; just like her; a tangled thread, barely knowing who she is anymore.

She released her hands from her cheeks making her eyes shrink to a slit, almost like a door which has been left ajar to a darkened hallway.

She then walked over to the bedroom's large bay windows, minding out not to step on the clutter which was spread extensively over a large quantity of her bedroom.

The room was dark, solely lit by a streetlight outside which would flicker from time to time.

The girl sat down on the large wooden window ledge which was covered with neatly arranged vintage cushions, their colours big and bold like a 70's fashion statement.

She turned her head so it was facing the outside, her face lit with the streetlight's distinct orange glow.

Placing her spindly fingers on the cold pane of glass, she stared endlessly into the darkened horizon. Her fingers were long and thin, all five of them spread out like a spider on the window. Her dark blue nail varnish was chipped showing her short nails; bitten short with anxiety.

She reached upwards towards the rusty handle, making her faded black t-shirt rise up to show a small amount of her worryingly flat stomach.

After a few struggles, she finally opened the window.

Just as she has slumped into a somewhat comfortable slouch, she realised her top had risen up. Beginning to panic she thought, "what if someone sees me?" After a moment her panic lessened. Glancing around to make no one was listening - which they obviously weren't, she took a deep breathe and looked endlessly into her lap; "who would want to look at me?" She whispered to her self; looking dejectedly at her dirty finger nails.

Snapping back into reality she jerked her top down; glancing out of the window and then around her room to make sure no one could see her, even though she knew she was completely alone. Pulling her sleeve down to cover her hawkish hands, she leaned forward and popped her head out of the window.

She breathed in the night's air; it was cold and sharp, biting the end of her nose.

She watched as a stray tom cat stopped mid-preening and looked around tentatively; almost knowing he was being watched.

An old woman in the 3rd storey window across the street muttered angrily; stopped, then slammed her window shut. This startled the cat, making him run down a darkened alleyway in disarray.

Although the alleyway was dark, if she squinted hard enough she could make out a human figure. But it wasn't just a normal figure, it had some sort of long pointed ears on the top of it's head and a long, sinous tail wound, what seemed like, infinitely around it's humanoid body; big and bushy like.. a cat...

She shook her head dismissively, "This can't be real!" She turned back towards the alleyway, "see," she thought, "it's gone! I must have been imagining it!"

She glanced away from the street below her and looked out across the vast horizon of high rise buildings.

Breathing out she made condensation on the cold glass; like the breath a fireless dragon. Then, with a wistful expression she stared upwards into the blackened sky, and sighed.

She was just about to shut the window when it began to snow; the little snowflakes landing on her pale, malnourished face.

She stuck out her tongue trying to catch the snowflakes which were falling gracefully around her, almost as if they were dancing to the sound of the whispering wind.

It made her feel like she was a child again; innocent and unaware of reality. Almost as if she was surrounded once again by her loving family.

But she knows she is completely and undoubtedly alone; all of the people she had once loved, gone. She has no one. Not even the truth. Just lies, which were swimming around in her brain giving her a headache.

She knows she can't go back. She knows the only way is forward. She is just a girl who is alone on Christmas Eve; without a plan.

She is convinced she is indifferent to everyone else but not everyone seems to agree...