outsider [h.s]

37

Harry's POV:

It's been five days since the worst day, the day when the girl I love parents died, and the day she became a stranger.

She won't eat, drink, and I can't even get one word out of her. She just sits or lays there, eyes blank as she stares at nothing, not even her twin brother able to bring her out of this cloud of what I can only assume is depression.

I don't know what to do anymore, how to help her come back to me, to want to live again. I thought telling her how much I loved her, or of how much her parents would be missed, or what our future would be like would help, but none of it does. She just listens to me and then turns away, closing her eyes and pretending to go asleep so I'll leave.

The worst of it is when I hear her sobbing late at night, she does it into the pillow, hoping I won't hear, but of course I do. That's the only time she lets me wrap my arms around her, whispering soothing things until she falls asleep again.

My heart has been shattered because hers has been as well, and I just want her back. I want the determined, loving, and even hostile Rose back.

I feel like she hasn't been that Rose since before she was shot, and now I just don't even know who she is anymore.

On the other hand, Chris continually talks about taking the rebellion a step forward, confronting the government head on. He says it's retaliation for the death of Rose's parents, but I can tell by the power lust in his eyes that it's more than that.

Before I came here I wanted to change how the world worked, but now I just want the love of my life to be happy, not caring what changes in society anymore.

She is my light, and without her I'm just a dark void, and I will do anything to bring her back.

-

Finally, today, on the seventh day, I've figured out how to get my Rose back.

First I made pancakes, delivering them to her, which she barely ate two bites of after my begging.

Then somewhere within the pleading I snapped, throwing the plate against the wall and watched it break into a million tiny pieces. That was the only time Rose showed some type of feeling, her eyes widening, fear becoming her.

"I'm sorry- I- I don't know why I did that." I say, not sure if I mean it. "It's just I love you so much, and seeing you like this is killing me. It's fucking killing me Rose, and I can't watch you be like this any longer."

No response from her, nothing.

I sigh before sitting down on the end of the bed, just by her feet.

"My parents are dead too, they were killed when I was just six years old. I was put into the system and shipped off to an orphanage, staying there until I was eighteen, and then I became a trainer because that's the job they gave me." My palms are sweaty as i relinquish my past to her, wiping them on my jeans before continuing.

"I was never given a choice in life until you," I laugh briefly, remembering the time she came into my life. "You had something about you..." I trail off, not knowing what else to say.

"Why were they killed?" Her voice is raspy from all the crying she's done, but I couldn't be happier to hear it.

"They were the leaders of the outsiders, and they were discovered by the government only to be murdered."

She sits up in bed, wrapping her arms around my torso, "I'm so sorry Harry."

"Don't be sorry, I forget who they were now except for a few great moments which my memory decided to keep." I smile, remembering the good times from my childhood.

"They were the leaders of the outsiders?" Rose asks, curiosity radiating from her.

"Yes, they started the group, planning to bring together a few protestors to take to government buildings, but eventually it turned out to become so much more than that."

"I wish you would've told me before," she says quietly.

"It takes a lot for me to open up to someone," I say plain and simply.

"I just don't know how to stop feeling this way Harry." She says suddenly, tears filling her eyes before she begins to cry, body shaking with sobs as I quickly wrap my arms around her and attempt to soothe the broken girl in front of me.

"Everyday is going to be hard Rose, but eventually one day you'll find yourself thinking about them less and less, and then you'll be able to smile about what they meant to you and the time you had with them."

"That's they problem, I don't want to think about them less. I did this to them, I'm to blame for their deaths." She says, her sobs becoming more intense at her revelation.

"No you're not, please never think that because it most definitely isn't true." I say, leaning back to wipe away her tears with the sleeve of my sweater.

"You really mean that?" She asks, strings broken up by choked sobs.

"Yes, you didn't even know they were being brought here, or could've stopped it in any way."

"I just want to be happy again." She confesses, something I know isn't easy for her right now.

"Be happy with me," I mumble, "I love you, and I want to make you happy again."

"I love you, Harry." She says, her voice finally back to normal as she leans into my chest, and for awhile we sit there in complete silence.

Somehow I will get my Rose back, and when I do I never plan on letting her go.

_____________________

this story only has a few chapters left so yeah

ALSO I WAS INCLUDED IN A NEWS ARTICLE WHICH IS CRAZY

this is the link: http://www.entertainmentwise.com/feature/162940/Anna-Todd-After-Which-One-Direction-fanfic-could-be-next-big-thing (if that doesn't work i also posted an update about it on my profile)

goal: 1200 votes and 500 comments

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