The Life And Times Of A ChairSniffa

The Life And Times Of A Chairsniffa (2)

Smell :- The Greatest Sense Of All

My first vivid nasal memory is of a real strong eucalyptus smell.

It was after my dad took us back to New Zealand for a month when I was just a wee little sniffa.

Perhaps it was because of being deprived of the eucalyptus smell for a month because I was over there, as I never truly noticed it despite living all my life with it all around me, which at that stage constituted a massive three or four years of nasal oriented experience.

But on my return, woah did I notice it.

I remember mum saying as we disembarked from the plane in Perth, Western Australia, "Get your jacket on as its pouring with rain outside."

Next thing I was on the tarmac and the smell of jet fuel hit me.

But that wasn't vivid.

I had smelt that smell before, at gas stations.

But when we got out of the airport thats when it hit me, and I said Dad what's that smell? And he didn't know what I meant. I think he may have let one go and thought I was referring to that.

Only later on when I was shown by my mates how to make a gum leaf whistle by folding it in half and blowing it did I realise what that smell was at the airport.

Eucalyptus.

I think that was the thing that made me realise "I think I am an aussie.....". It was a revelation I suppose.

At the airport after that rain it was heavy and hung in the air and that memory still affects me today.

You see up in the north west of Australia, 1700km north of Perth, it's the real outback up there. When I say outback, what do you see in your head?

48degrees celcius temperatures? Spinifex plains? An ancient semi arid landscape? A full 360degree view of the blue sky? Cause thats what the Pilbara is like.

And in the Pilbara, on the coastline is the iron ore mining town of Port Hedland.

My hometown.

So how does that smell affect me even today?

Ok ok this may start to get a little naughty so all you kids better cover your eyes now or find something else to read.......

You see up there rain falls like on two or three days of the year. Sometimes not at all.

Up north of us (600km north) its more tropical and so they get rain during The Wet Season.

Down south of us (about 600km south) its raining all the friggin time by comparison.

But for us rain only really comes during Cyclones, or what the Americans call Hurricanes and the Japanese Typhoons.

So we don't get that earthy, raw smell you get before the rain very often. That natural musky scent that comes after it.

So when it comes, woah, the eucalypts release that smell into the air, well......

How do I say this without being anatomical specifity?

Perhaps I could explain it from the view of the animals which live in these harsh environment.

That smell is the smell of life.

The grasses grow more seeds, the seeds feed herbivores which are then fed on by carnivores, which means its Epic amounts of Copious Food around for a limited time.

Perfect for raising a child.

Well thats how I try to explain it to my pregnant fiancee and I am sure all desert peoples around the world can relate to it.

Or am I just weird?

Ok I'll spell it out.

Rain makes me Horny OK!!!

And I am sure there is a perfectly logical explanation based on an ancient natural instinct cave men had when in times of drought they were hungry and last thing on their mind was copulation, then when the drought ended, whammo, the stomach is full and its party time!!!!

I tell ya if they bottled that scent and made it a perfume.... Well they better not sell that perfume here in Australia cause the outback guys would need medical attention!!!

Hence why smell is the greatest sense of all to me! It spells out LIFE in big capital letters.

And I suspect why aussie guys are so loved when they go to Britain.....

Ahhhh smell!!!! You know what I mean! Why do you women wear perfume and us guys wear deodorant?

Because It Makes The Opposite Sex Say Rawwwwrrrr!

Not the lion language RAWRR I am gonna eat you, you tasty morsel of a human!!

The other other rawrrr without capitalisation.

rawwwrrrr.

Anyway I think I am getting too freaky right now....... I better get off before I get too carried away.

You don't know where I live and I dunno where you live, and its sunny here today, so don't worry, your safe from my rawrrrr's!!!

555-5555 if you wanna call me anyway.

rawwwrrrrr.