Faith is Stronger (Harry Potter Fan fiction)

Chp. 32 Gone

"Incomprehensible. What more can I say? The pain. The anger. The sudden absence of her? It's goddamn incomprehensible!" - Unknown.

Draco's P.o.V.

My thoughts are centered on her, only her, as I pick my way around my godfather. He can certainly handle himself in a duel with Potter. I need to get to her. I was wrong, so wrong. About what I had to do. About the life I thought I chose. I wanted only her.

I freeze as silence falls. The battle is roaring around us, yes, but silence falls between us nevertheless. His eyes as he turns to me, unforgivable hatred, undeniable loss. And it's my fault. I made all of this possible.

Yet, I can't help but let disbelief course through me as Potter raises his wand at me. I know without a doubt that I would be too slow to pull mine before he cursed me. I knew what was coming, how could I not? I had led his mentor to his death. A death that should have been given by me, but instead I had to watch my godfather stain his soul instead.

I take a quick breath, feeling my tired body almost ache for the sweet relief of Potter's curse. Release and peace. But to leave without letting her know what I chose in my last moment would be hell instead of heaven.

"Draco!"

I stumble back as Jacky forces herself in front of me; her eyes are sad and raw from crying. My heart picks up in pace as her lips press against mine, yet it is a kiss full of frantic desperation. I begin to wrap my arms around her, wanting to hold up her wobbling form, wondering what the hell she is doing here.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Time stops as she falls to the ground, the light of the curse fading from her body.

The air is like moving through syrup while I drop to my knees beside her, my entire body numb. My head fills with fog as I look at her still face, her still chest, her eyes still open.

"Jacky? Jacky get up! Jacky!" I whisper, shaking her shoulders as a terrible shaking takes over my limbs.

I hold down her shoulders as my head descends to her chest, my ear pressed desperately over her heart to feel her pulse. Not her. Anyone but her.

Faintly, a low moan of pain echoes around me. My throat is sore as I pull her into my arms, touching her face, begging her to make her heart beat. To blink and wake up.

I scream her name but she doesn't reply. Why doesn't she reply?

"Jacky!" I scream again, grabbing the back of her neck and looking straight into her thunder eyes, the life gone from them.

"Malfoy" I look up at Potter and Finnegan's shocked faces. Shocked? They should be horrified!

"You killed her! You son of a bitc*! I'm going to kill you!" I vow. I was truly seeing red. She's gone. My Jacky is gone. My witch is dead.

"Malfoy, listen to us!" Potter yells, breaking through my tumbled thoughts. All I can feel is her body in my arms, all that I can see are her eyes that refuse to look at me.

Before I can respond, Aunt Bellatrix comes up behind me, pointing her wand laughingly at the murderers.

"Oh dear, looks like they missed you, Draco!" She laughs insanely. I shudder and choke out a sob, trying to reel it in. Jacky is gone. My girl's gone.

"Come Draco. The Dark Lord is waiting. You've done well." Snape murmurs, touching my arm. Why is he so warm?

Instinct begins to take over.

I look at her, my Jacky, one last time. Her face was smooth and pale; void of life. Her eyes I close gently, unable to face the storm within them. Swollen skin around them is the only evidence of her earlier tears, and blood the only symbol of her role in the battle. Her hair is haywire and spread haphazardly across her shoulders and partially her face. I force my hand to brush the obscuring strands away, wondering where the new tears are falling from; wondering why the rain is hitting only my face.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you, Jaclyn Grace. I'm sorry." I whisper, feeling my godfather's grip on my shoulder tighten in warning. My Aunt jerks me upright just as I lay my witch gently to the ground, pulling me away.

My head is still numb, my body shaking like a leaf. I can feel everything I hoped for, everything I put my faith in, fall farther away with each step I unwillingly took. I glance back, ready to take her in my arms and never leave her, when I see Potter standing over her, staring at me.

"I'll get you for this Potter! I'll kill you if it's the last thing I do!" I yell at him. And I mean it. She is gone. He took her away.

It echoes in my mind. Over and over. She's gone. She's gone. She's not coming back. She's gone.

Seconds before apparating, it finally clicked. It was all over.

Jacky is gone...gone forever. My reason to hope was gone forever. Gone.

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Read Please:

I can feel your hate. I can literally feel the curses you are all throwing my way. I'm sending them my way too! It hurts now, and it's going to hurt for a while. I had to do this guys. No matter what you say, it had to happen.

Forgive me. That's all I can ask.

Furthermore, please rant and rave and go crazy on the comments. Let it ALL out. I beg you all to. Not only did I just lose a character tonight, but I also lost a friend. I'm not talking about in a figurative sense, either. I've actually lost two really close, really cherished friends this week and your comments and thoughts on the story will really help. I need distraction, my darlings. CLARIFICATION! None of my friends have died! I meant that they are no longer friends. It feels like a death, but thankfully no one died.

You really don't know how heavy a heart is until it's in pieces within you.

p.s. Listen and feel the lyrics to the song on the side. It will help.

p.p.s. The Sequel, Stronger for You, is now available!