Critical || Luke Hemmings

Chapter Eleven

We had all fallen asleep in a small pile in the lounge, other than Luke who was nowhere to be found when the morning came around.  I tried my best to pull myself out from underneath the boys without waking them.  After a bit of a struggle, I managed to free myself and headed off the bus to make the call to John. 

I opened the door to the bus to run straight into a very sleepy looking Luke.

“Sydney,” he muttered quietly, stabilizing me so I wouldn’t fall over.

“Luke,” I looked at him concerned.  It’s not often that I’m actually as tall as him, but the bus gave me the height I needed to look directly at him.  He looked like hell, the bags under his eyes were very apparent and his hair was not in it’s perfect quiff it always seemed to fall into.  “Are you okay?  How long have you been out?” 

“I don’t really know, the bus stopped and I got off and started to walk around.  What time is it?”

“It’s almost 11,” I giggled at his expression as his eyes grew in size.

“Oh my god,” he brought a hand to his face and groaned.

“Luke, are you alright?” I said grabbing his shoulders and forcing him to look at me.  He didn’t say anything, he just shook his head slightly and moved his gaze from my eyes to his feet.

“I just.. “ he paused briefly sucking in a breath and biting on his lip.  “I don’t want you to go.”  I said slightly above a whisper.

I gulped as the color in my cheeks got redder, nodding my head slightly.  “I know, I don’t want to leave either.”

“So stay with us.  Stay here and work.  We’ll pay you more if that’s what you need.  Just don’t leave us.  Don’t leave me,” he whimpered, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me closer.  The butterflies in my stomach were growing by the second.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.  I forgot how much I missed his hugs.  In fact, I missed just having any alone time with Luke.  He was one of the most amazing people I’ve ever been around and this past month has made me lose sight of all that.

“Please don’t go,” he mumbled into the crook of my neck.  I could tell he was crying and it was breaking me.

“Luke, this is a once in a lifetime chance.” I bit my lip, trying to hold myself together.  The rest of the boys and I had gotten most of our emotions out last night.  I thought I’d gotten every ounce of tears I had in me out, but apparently I was wrong.  He didn’t say anything; he just shook his head and pulled me into him closer.  I wiped my tears off my cheeks and took a deep breath.

After a few moments of standing in that position, he finally spoke. “I can’t lose you,” was all he mumbled out before pulling away from me and looking at me with reddened eyes. 

Seeing him this way was not something I wanted to witness.  I lived for his smile, and knowing I’m the reason it went away, made me feel sick to my stomach.  “Luke, you know you could never lose me-“

“No Sydney, just listen,” he said cutting me off, shaking his head.  “Ever since we met, you’ve always been the person I turn to.  Do you remember, back when we were first starting out, you’d pull me aside before every concert and take a stupid picture with me and tell me that some day those would be worth a fortune?”  

I nodded my head, remembering all the pictures I still have saved on my computer.  “You used to get so irritated with me,” I giggled causing him to let out a breathy laugh as he nodded in agreement.

“You’ve always supported me.  You’ve been my rock when I need someone.  You keep me in line and this past month has sucked without you being there.  And then you kissed Ashton and I felt my heart fall out of my chest-“

“Wait, you saw that?” I gulped. 

He nodded, looking down at his hands.  “I wish I hadn’t.. I’ve never been so angry at someone in my life.”

“How could you be angry?  You’ve been making out with Emily for the past month.  I put my lips on someone elses and you suddenly get upset?” I felt the anger in me start to boil over.  “You can’t do that.  That’s not allowed.” I said, poking at his chest with my finger.  “You think I like watching soft fucking porn staring my best friend every day? Because trust me-“ And just like that, his lips were on mine.

I stiffened at first, surprised by his sudden burst of affection until I realized just how great his lips felt against mine.  Pulling him in closer, if that was even possible, I let my lips mold into his as my stomach erupted in butterflies. 

You know when people tell you that you know when a kiss with the right person will give you that spark?  They’re not lying.  But it’s so much more than that.  I’ve kissed a few people in my day and nothing has felt quite like this.  Starting from my lips, down to my toes, my entire body felt charged with this feeling of ecstasy.  For years I’ve often wondered what it would be like to kiss Luke.  Deep down I knew I’d like it and I think that’s why I never did.  I knew I’d get addicted to this feeling.  Which is when Emily came into my thoughts.  Shit.

I pushed Luke off of me and looked at him, confused about all the emotions running through me.  “You shouldn’t have done that Lucas.” I muttered stepping back slightly.

He bit his lip and nodded looking directly at me.  “You shouldn’t have kissed me back.”

I felt my face redden and shook my head.  “You have a girlfriend.  You can’t do that.  I can’t do that.  We can’t- we just can’t.  We’re best friends.  You just ruined this whole thing,” I said motioning between us before pushing past him and running off the bus.  I heard his attempts at trying to stop me, but I refused to stop running.

After making it out of view of the bus I rested against the side of a building and tried to catch my breath.  I kissed Luke, and I liked it.  A lot.  And I would whole-heartedly do it over and over again.

I pulled out my phone and dialed the number for Fueled by Ramen, ready to make one of the biggest decisions of my life.

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Feel free to fangirl with me now because THEY KISSED GOD DAMN IT THEY KISSED AND IT WAS GREAT GOODBYE WORLD.