1.A 20 year old boy gets married to a 65 year old lady. The next day
> after marriage, the boy dies. Reason: He drank expired milk.


2. Why do women love gold more than man? Because Gold has 24 Carrots
> while man has only one Carrot.


3. What is a kiss ? Kiss is an enquiry in the first floor, about
> vacancy in the Ground Floor.


4. Today, in style are small cars, small watches, short skirts, and
> small mobile phones. There will come a time, when the SMALL
> PENIS will be in style, and then YOU will be the man!!!!!!



5.Sardar to sardarni:" Let's try something different, let me do it
> in your ear."
> Sardarni:"Hohji, aur mein behri ho gayi to?"
> Sardar:"Aaj tak goongi hui kya?"


6.Palat ke dekh jalim, tamanna hum bhi rakhte hai,
> husn tum rakhti ho, to, jawani hum bhi rakhte hai,
> gehrai tum rakhti ho, to lambai hum bhi rakhte hai......



7.Jab tere Chicku thhe, sab tere peechoo thhe,
> Jab tere Aam huye, sab pareshan hue,
> Jab tere Kharbhuch hue,bade ajube hue,
> Jab tere jhool gaye, sab tuje bhool gaye!!!!



8.Sexual Thoughts for Today : its not the length, its not the
> size,its how many times you can make it rise!its not how well it
> >fits
> > > but
> how
> often you can make it spit!!!!



9.Teacher asks: Why do buffaloes seem depressed when milked?
> Little Harry: Mam, if someone rubs your boobs for two hours & doesnt
> fuck you, how would you feel????


10. Wife to Doc: An ant entered my vagina. Please help and take it out.
> Doctor removes her panty and starts making love to her.
> Wife(angrily): What are you doing?
> Doc: This is the only way. I will drown the bastard.



11. What do you call two homos having sex? DANDIA
> What do you call a group of homos having sex? DISCO DANDIA
> What do you call hundreds of homos having sex? LATHI CHARGE


12.Man was sobbing in a bar. His friend asked 'why?'
>He said: "my wife makes me pay Rs 1,000/- for every fuk!"
>Friend said:
>
>"you're lucky, she charges others Rs 2,500/-"

14.What did Stayfree tell to condom:
Boss, if u fail, both of us will be out of business for 10 months.

15.What did first ant say to the other climbing the king's legs:
Let's meet at the royal balls.


16.Newlywed couple after having first shot!

Husband: I'll be very frank with u, dear you're not the first girl
I've fucked.
Bride: I'll also be frank, you have still to learn a lot about fucking.




*********************************************************************
All couples have different phases of sex life:
>
> > Age 20 - din raat
>
> > Age 28 - roz raat
>
> > Age 38 - jumme raat
>
> > Age 48 - chandni raat
>
> > Age 58 - only jazbaat



***************************************************
Once there was a sardarji !! he always used to see triple xxx movie and after seeing that movie, his penis used to get hard enough and then he used to have sex with his wife !!
This continued till many years until one day after seeing that movie, when his penis became ready to hit the target of his wife, something went wrong and before reaching the target, his penis had gone down !
The Sardarji was shocked and so he went and again watched the movie and again his penis became hard , so he ran to his wife but till he reached there, his thing had again gone down !
His wife was disappointed and so was sardarji !! so he got one idea ! He took a tub full of water and then he again went to watch the movie and when his penis became hard, he immidiately put his penis inside the tub which was filled with water !
Sardarji's wife got surprised and asked , "arre, yeh app kya kar rahe ho? "sardarji replied " mai dekh raha hun, kahin meri penis Puncture to nahi hogaye "!!

************************************************************

A very beautiful woman did not marry and was getting old.
A few friends got worried and talked to four top sportsmen and they agreed to marry her. The friends then approached the woman with the proposal. The sportmen were from the field of cricket, football, hockey and billiards.
The Women spends some quality time with all the sports men alone, then she requested time to think over.
After a few days the friends again approached the woman to know who she had selected. The woman rejected all of them. The friends wanted to know the reason. The woman replied:
The cricket player when he is in form he keeps on making century otherwise he is out for a duck!