I am in deep shit right now. My manager is going to kill me! There is a huge concert tonight and I really needed to be there a lot earlier than this to help out with the sound check and lighting check.
shit.
Why the hell does he have to do this to me on such an important date!
***Earlier This Morning***
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
“Arrrggghhh…” I groaned as the alarm clock rang out from my bedside table, its loud and irritating buzz making my head throb.
I slowly turned around in my bed so I was facing the alarm and I slammed my hand on its ringer to get the awful noise to stop. Time to get up.
I rolled out of bed, landing on the old faded carpet with a loud thud. I moaned as I crumpled up in pain on the floor, I had landed on my side, having completely forgotten about the huge bruise that was situated there.
I got up and observed my appearance in the mirror across the room. That bruise had turned from being completely invisible into a deep shade of purple overnight. The bruise just added to my awful appearance. I had multiple scars across my legs and cuts across my wrist and down my arm. I had long zigzag scar jutting down my back and small slit on my face that had opened up again while I was sleeping. I wiped the drop of blood off of my face and ruffled my curly, fiery red hair. I had dyed it that colour as soon as I turned 15 because I was sick of my dull blonde hair that had hung at my cheeks so I had gone for a bright defiant colour. My lifeless blue eyes scanned my ugly body up and down instantly seeing each and every flaw. My short stubby legs emphasised my thighs and my singlet top hugged my chest in all the wrong places. My belly button was pierced and currently held a small gold bar with a little red love heart hanging from it.
I turned on my side to observe my stomach and I saw the tattoo. It was a medium sized infinity tattoo on my hip with the word UGLY on it, stating that I will be ugly forever. This was completely true according to Joel. Joel made me get it when I was still with him and now I really believed him. He had convinced me after telling me for so long.
So now I have a bruise, scars and a tattoo to show for his abuse. Well that’s just great. Absolutely fantastic. Thanks a lot Joel.
Joel is my abusive ex-boyfriend who finds pleasure in breaking me down every day, whether he does physically or mentally I don’t know, he changes his form of attack every day. Basically he makes me feel like shit 24/7.
********************* FLASHBACK *******************************
At lunch I had been sitting with my friends Jacinta and Camille. Jacinta is the complete opposite of me; she is tall, has long brown hair, lovely tan skin and a really thin figure. Whereas Camille is basically the same as me except she had her natural blonde hair still and she was heaps prettier. I got up to go to the loo quickly and as I rounded the corner to get there I come face to face with my terroriser Joel.
“What do you want?” I spat at him with venom in my voice.
“Nothing much. I just wanted your opinion on something.” He said with a smirk.
“And what would that be Joel?” I glared at him.
And out of nowhere he kicked me on the side of my ribs causing pain to jolt through my body. He did this repeatedly for a couple of minutes as I crumpled to the floor. When he finally stopped he leaned down and whispered in my ear,
“How much did that hurt?”
He laughed loudly in my ear and started to walk away chuckling to himself.
I picked myself up off of the floor, brushed myself off and walked swiftly to the bathroom limping so that I didn’t put too much pressure on my right side so that I could avoid wincing in utter pain. I soon made it to the bathroom but I no longer needed to be there. I just sat behind the toilet block and cried. But as I cried the sobs racked my body, causing me to clutch my ribs as waves of pain ripped down my side. I pulled myself together quickly, as to avoid any further pain or humiliation.
As the last tears trickled down my face I slowly rose to my feet and headed towards the entrance to the toilet block so I could clean myself up. I walked in and thankfully no one was there to badger me about why I was limping or why my face was stained with tears. So I walked up to the one of the sinks and splashed the freezing water all over my face, getting some water on my shirt in the process. I looked at my awful appearance in the mirror and thought,
God, why did you ruin my life by giving me this bloody ugly body? I’ve already got so much to deal with anyways.
I’ve always hated my body, maybe not as much when I was younger but Joel had taught me how to truly hate what I had been given.
Honestly, I regretted every moment I had ever loved Joel or been with him. He had ruled my life ever since we had started dating and I had given up precious time with my sister, just so I could see him.
Why had I not seen through his little act before I had gotten into this mess? I knew exactly why. He had played with me and my feelings, pulling at my heart strings. He had said things that he never meant. Such as the most famous three words, I Love You. All of it had been utter lies.
He never loved me.
He never cared for me.
He lied every moment I was with him.
He was a lying cheating bastard.
And he had ruined my life. One step at a time...
Those were my general thoughts throughout the rest of the day, which did not make me feel any better.
I had washed my face thoroughly to clean all the tear stains off my very flushed cheeks, then quickly gathered up all my things and headed back towards my small but loyal group of friends.
They didn’t know what had been happening to me since I broke it off with Joel, they didn’t know what I suffered when coming to this hell hole known as school.
It wasn’t because they didn’t realise.
It was because I hadn’t told them.
They were such kind, caring, compassionate people. I refused to burden them with the knowledge of the physical and emotional abuse I was put through.
They already had enough to worry about, they didn’t deserve it.
So I never breathed a word of it to anyone...
******************** END FLASHBACK **********************
A/N Sorry had to repost the updated version... Ok if this story gets 5 votes then I will post the next chapter! YAY :P Hope you guys like it.
P.S this story is rated PG- 13 because it gets quite violent in some spots so sorry 'bout that...
