BEAUTIFUL MONSTER

45 : Make Love

I was on the computer, checking my social websites which I had been abandoning lately. First was Facebook. I scrolled through my newsfeed, bored instantly. I did, however, like the status of an older girl announcing the birth of her baby boy. Then I went on twitter, tweeting the lyrics of a Pitbull song with a puking emoji. When I logged onto Instagram, I was double tapping on a few cute selfies and passing pictures of food with an eye roll. I noticed Kelly had posted a picture yesterday of her kissing a dog.

I was taken-aback at her caption: #Bestiality

She followed it with a heart.

My fingers flew across the keyboard as I commented. Uh WTF? I added a laughing emoji just so she wouldn't take offence and waited for her response. Ten minutes past, and I had already been through quite a lot of selfies of her with Ali on her profile page. I didn't like all of them so it wouldn't seem like I was sucking up to her and I totally ignored the picture of a big group of friends with the caption: R.I.P Ross #gatheringparty

I felt guilty enough as it was. I didn't know how to approach Kelly or Ali, apologising just seemed ... Awkward. I was from a generation that had iPhones and Galaxy's attached to arms, and so, social media seemed the best way to get Kelly speaking to me again. Although, my comment...

I logged off, annoyed that I was over thinking absolutely everything. My social skills sucked. They wouldn't get any better just by being on a website.

I went on Google. Just as I was going to type in 'The Incomplete' to find out more information about it I sat back, realising I could just ask Orion to tell me more about it. It wouldn't be too suspicious of me, would it?

*******

I was at my breaking point. Darius had pushed me way over the line, pelted me with foul eggs, and demolished every speck of patience and self-control I ever had. I never knew I could hate someone as much as him. Mum had gone to work, Ellie was at school, and I was in the house, ready to rip my hair off out of frustration as Darius felt the need to whinge like a fucking little bitch (!) about every god damn thing about me.

Just as he started up about school again, and how I was going to get nowhere especially if I carried on the way I did, I took out my phone and dialled Mum's number.

"Are you even listening to me? Who are you calling?"

Luckily, I had caught Mum having her break. "Hello?"

"Mum, I'm going to commit suicide. I just thought I'd let you know, goodbye."

"Beatrice? What-- what are you on about?"

"Either you let me go out, Mum, or I go to the bathroom upstairs and slit my wrist." I waited, quietly listening to Mum and then I held the phone out to Darius. "She wants to speak to you."

Darius glowered at me, snatching the phone out of my hand and scratching me with his nail on the way. "She's being overdramatic, like aways. If she wants to slit her wrists, I say we should let her do it. She's going to realise sooner or later that attention seeking is not the best way to go."

I could've smacked him.

I wished I did.

What sort of shitty not-really-your-parent even says that? If you're going to pretend to be a father, at least be a good one.

"No, of course not... I don't know what's wrong with her... I haven't said anything... Are you sure?" Darius's tone turned sour and his expression mirrored it. He passed my phone back to me, looking like he was going to punch a wall to vent out his frustrations.