"Fifty Shades of Grey"

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My body aches. My skin is barley clinging to my bones. My bones are barely gaurding my organs, and my blood, it barely circulates through my body.

My body could fall apart at my command, or it could hold itself together for you. You touch can turn my skin to ashes and boil my blood; it can rot my bones black, and turn my heart to steel.

My body exists for you.

You are my alcohol, my cocaine, heroine, weed,

my felicity.

You only have one shade:destruction.

I have fifty:

adaptable, weak, dedicated, flexible, follower, qualified, trained, vigorous, understanding, loyal, pleasing, straight-forward, slave-like, bitch, stubborn, complying, well-behaved, intelligent, contradicting, prostitute.

Thirty more shades that i can list for you about me, but my hands ache: like my body.

My soul cries; it's shallow, but filled with hope.

Maybe you'll come back.

I am dirt. I am filthy, crumbly, unfiltered, brown shit.You made me that way, you used me.

I was a rose, but you knew that already.

My body aches,

get me out of this fucking rehab center,

I'm not addicted to drugs, never overdosed on perscriptioned pills, i was never an alcoholic, I'm not a psychopath,

I'm here because i knew what it was like to know you.

                                                                                                       © 2012, Almog.

 

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