I'M THE VAMPIRE LESTAT. REMEMBER ME? THE vampire who became a super rock
star, the one who wrote the autobiography? The one with the blond hair
and the gray eyes, and the insatiable desire for visibility and fame?
You remember. I wanted to be a symbol of evil in a shining century that
didn't have any place for the literal evil that I am. I even figured I'd
do some good in that fashion-playing the devil on the painted stage.
And I was off to a good start when we talked last. I'd just made my
debut in San Francisco-first "live concert" for me and my mortal band.
Our album was a huge success. My autobiography was doing respectably
with both the dead and the undead.
Then something utterly unforeseen took place. Well, at least I hadn't
seen it coming. And when I left you, I was hanging from the proverbial
cliff, you might say.
Well, it's all over now-what followed. I've survived, obviously. I
wouldn't be talking to you if I hadn't. And the cosmic dust has finally
settled; and the small rift in the world's fabric of rational beliefs
has been mended, or at least closed.
I'm a little sadder for all of it, and a little meaner and a little more
conscientious as well. I'm also infinitely more powerful, though the
human in me is closer to the surface than ever-an anguished and hungry
being who both loves and detests this invincible immortal shell in which
I'm locked.
The blood thirst? Insatiable, though physically I have never needed the
blood less. Possibly I could exist now without it altogether. But the
lust I feel for everything that walks tells me that this will never be
put to the test.
You know, it was never merely the need for the blood anyway, though the
blood is all things sensual that a creature could desire; it's the
intimacy of that moment-drinking, killing-the great heart-to-heart dance
that takes place as the victim weakens and I feel myself expanding,
swallowing the death which, for a split second, blazes as large as the
life.
That's deceptive, however. No death can be as large as a life. And
that's why I keep taking life, isn't it? And I'm as far from salvation
now as I could ever get. The fact that I know it only makes it worse.
Of course I can still pass for human; all of us can, in one way or
another, no matter how old we are. Collar up, hat down, dark glasses,
hands in pockets-it usually does the trick. I like slim leather jackets
and tight jeans for this disguise now, and a pair of plain black boots
that are good for walking on any terrain. But now and then I wear the
fancier silks which people like in these southern climes where I now
reside.
If someone does look too closely, then there is a little telepathic
razzle-dazzle: Perfectly normal, what you see. And a flash of the old
smile, fang teeth easily concealed, and the mortal goes his way.
Occasionally I throw up all the disguises; I just go out the way I am.
Hair long, a velvet blazer that makes me think of the olden times, and
an emerald ring or two on my right hand. I walk fast right through the
downtown crowds in this lovely corrupt southern city; or stroll slowly
along the beaches, breathing the warm southern breeze, on sands that are
as white as the moon.
Nobody stares for more than a second or two. There are too many other
inexplicable things around us-horrors, threats, mysteries that draw you
in and then inevitably disenchant you. Back to the predictable and
humdrum. The prince is never going to come, everybody knows that; and
maybe Sleeping Beauty's dead.
It's the same for the others who have survived with me, and who share
this hot and verdant little corner of the universe-the southeastern tip
of the North American continent, the glistering metropolis of Miami, a
happy hunting ground for bloodthirsting immortals if ever there was such
a place.
It's good to have them with me, the others; it's crucial, really- and
what I always thought I wanted: a grand coven of the wise, the enduring,
the ancient, and the careless young.
But ah, the agony of being anonymous among mortals has never been worse
for me, greedy monster that I am. The soft murmur of preternatural
voices can't distract me from it. That taste of mortal recognition was
too seductive-the record albums in the windows, the fans leaping and
clapping in front of the stage. Never mind that they didn't really
believe I was a vampire; for that moment we were together. They were
calling my name!
Now the record albums are gone, and I will never listen to those songs