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Queen's Thoughts


Copyright Shazneem Tamana

Dedicated to my extended family:

@boofhead @psdoffhby @lilly-rain @Christinag1227 @AggieDiva35 @GiamoniCooper





Inner Turmoil





My heart says go


My mind says no


Hurt I am


Lost I feel


You meant the world


For I gave you the world


You could not value it


You could not treasure it


My support


My love


My caresses


You did not need


You did not feel its worth


You threw it away


With that last blow


My years of hardwork


My years of loyalty


My years of love and support


You threw away like it was nothing at all


Did you not realise I had a limit?


Did you not listen to my words "dont push me too far?"


All gone and lost


Because of your anger and control


To cage another


When you want to be free


To limit another


When you want the unlimited


To hurt another


When you want to be unhurt


where, pray tell,


is the sense, the justice in this?


Is it ignorance?




do you assume this is manhood?


I bleed inside


Yet smile for my loved ones


I do my duties


That which you could never match up to do


You feel not what I had


The love


The respect


The need


The want


You felt none of it




The Pain


The Hurt


The Whimpers


The Moans


The Agony


The Loss


The Loneliness


The Betrayal


The sheer heights of losing all I put so much into


You shall feel


Your Time will come


For he sees all


You said He forgives anyone who asks for forgivness


But you took no note of the fact 


That he sees if your apoligy was truthful


If you would learnt not to do it again


Yet time and time again you did it


And now your apoligies mean nothing to me or Him


Life will be hard for me


But atleast it will be away from you


Life will be harder for you


Mark my words it shall be


For noone will cook your meals


Pay your bills


Wash you clothes


And do all I did


For nothing in return


I asked not of 




Nor of anything else


I needed not 


Materialistic things


Nor words of the moons and stars


I hoped


Simply hoped


I would get my dues


The Love


The Respect


The Support


That all woman deserve and need


Yet you gave me nothing




Took everything


You took my innocent smiles of teen years


and turned them into fake smiles of the feared


You took my sweet sixteen laughter, that boomed the walls


And turned them into surpressed coughs


You took away those who meant so much to me


Turning me into a loner

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