Well, I'm starting a new story... I hope you enjoy.... I really don't know what to say... Just... this is dedicated to my dear Ivan Montes in heaven. R.I.P. I miss you! You are my inspiration to writing this story... I hope you people enjoy... I know I already said that. If you read, you might figure out what I'm writing about. If you really wanna know and haven't figured it out, comment or message me... There's a song you could listen to on the right.
There was a heavy wind outside. The clouds threatened to cry... cry... just like me. My face was as pale as that clean sheet of paper you write on and on my brown eyes, you could see signs of pain. Me and clouds. We are the same. I love the rain. It is nature's finest creation.
I felt my nose with the tip of my finger. It was freezing. I stood outside a big building, my brother holding my other hand. I was on the verge of tears. My father had beaten me just before he dropped us off here. I looked at the stormy grey clouds.
"Mum?" Are you up there, threatening to cry, too? Are you watching over us? I don't want you to care for me! I killed you! I don't deserve your tears or your love! I didn't want to kill you! I'm sorry! Dad blames me for your death... and I believe him. It's my fault you ended up dead.
Jeremy sensed my guilt. He kneeled down in front of me. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, to my chin and fall onto the ground. He hugged me tightly. "Listen Evan! It is not our fault mum died!!"
"YES IT IS!!!!" I shouted, and pushed him off of me. Lies. I killed her! Don't tell me I didn't! I know I did. "I KILLED HER! I just had to be born! It's because of my life that she gave up hers! I hate myself!"
"You didn't have a choice to be born or not," he spoke softly but didn't try to hug me again. He knows if I push him away, it means stay away. Well at least he thinks it means that. Secretly, I want him to hug me again, but I learn to deal with it.
The sky cried. Tears fell down and made their own melody against the concrete surface. It shouted. I heard the thunder clearly. It was shouting at me. It was screaming. The sky was in pain. It sent lightning to earth. Its pain couldn't be held in. It had to escape.
"AAAAAARGGGGH!!!!!" I screamed as loud as I could. I fell to the floor loud and I heard my knees bump onto the floor loudly. A hurricane of tears streamed down my face. Me and the clouds. Me and the sky. We understand each other. We know each other's pain. My hands were balled into fists and I hit them with all of my freaking force on the ground. I felt a sharp pain, but ignored it. My voice broke into sobs, along with the thunder.
I let the cold rain drops fall onto me. I let them soak under my clothes. Mum, you must hate me for taking your life away. I felt Jeremy staring down at me. "I HATE YOU!!!!!" I yelled as I threw my head back and looked at the sky. I don't know who exactly I said that to, but I know I hated somone somewhere.
So this is my punishment for taking your life away. Having a horrible life of my own. Jeremy's hand touched my shoulder. I gave in. I slapped his hand away and hugged him. I gripped tightly at his coat and sobbed into his shoulder. I bit my lip to stop my sobs. The sky tried to lower its shouts also. Together we calmed down. Its melody no longer playing.
Death... what a wonderful thing. At the same time... it's a horrible thing. I want to die... No one cares for me. I only have my brother... no one else. My mum died. My dad left us out here in front of a big building. I never had any friends. The kids all hated me for being distant. They don't like my music. How I dress. Most of all... they dislike the source of it all. Me.
I'm destined to never be loved. One day, I fear- but know- that Jeremy will leave me... whether he wants to or not. He'll leave me... But... I don't want that to happen... I want us to be together forever. I want this melody of ours to continue and never end.
"Evan, I'll always be here for you." he whispered into my brown wavy hair.
"Baka... you'll leave me. Just like everyone near me has. You'll leave me behind just like souls leave their bodies. You'll get away."
"You're the one who's stupid. Stop talking in your stupid poetry! Get this through your thick head! I WON'T EVER LEAVE YOU, DUMBASS!!!!" He then did something I've never seen him do. He cried. Yes. Cried. As in tears slipping away from glassy eyes. As in what I had just done.