Life. What is the point of it? We go around living our lives to just one day die. Everyone has to die. But nobody knows when they are going to leave earth. And some people are vain enough to think they will live forever. I think that since we never know what is going to happen tomorrow we should live today the way we want to. So that's why, right now I am sucking up my fears and going up to him. The guy I have had a crush on since I was seven. The guy who has always been there for me. My best friend. And even though lately he has been acting weird and distancing himself from me, I am going to tell him how I feel. I know this could end horribly wrong but its a chance I really have to take. Because seriously, I dont know how much longer I can take being held up in my room pining for him.
As I walked up to his car after school had let out I noticed that he was surrounded by a bunch of his guy friends. I stopped for a second to gather my thoughts. Should I really do this? I mean, it could ruin our friendship. But the way it has been going lately, I dont think it would matter too much. I took a deep breath and then I realized. If he liked me, would he be acting like this towards me? No. He wouldnt. So he must not like me. I sighed and turned around. Suddenly instead of being nervous, I was incredibly sad. I started walking to the buses when I heard someone yell my name. Of course it was him. I didnt turn around though. I didnt want him to see how upset I was. I kept walking to the bus and I heard him jogging up to me.
"Hey Ruth! Wait." Les shouted.
I couldn't bring myself to stop. I walked up the stairs to the bus like I didnt hear him. I saw that there was barely anyone on the bus today. Then I remembered it was Wednesday. That meant there was a football game tonight and most of the people on my bus were either football players or cheerleaders. I was grateful that I didnt have to put up with them today seens how i was already in a bad mood. I took a seat on the left side of the bus by myself. I sat my bag next to me on the seat so no one could sit next to me. I took out my ipod and put my headphones in my ears. I shuffled through my songs until I found my favorite artist, Taylor Swift. I blasted the volume and silently sang along to Our Song. I put my head up against the window and closed my eyes waiting for the bus driver to leave.
I couldnt help but let my mind drift to Les. I pictured his tall figure and muscular build(not too muscular, just enough so you could tell he works out). His silk like black hair that swayed in the wind . I saw his milk chocolate eyes that always seemed happy and his favorite sweatshirt that he always wore. It was a black pullover that said ' You're cool' in blue letters. I smiled to myself as I remebered the first time he wore it. When I saw him in it I smiled and said, " Looks like you've got one thing right."
He looked at me confused until I pointed at his sweatshirt. He laughed and said sarcastically, " Well thats why I got it. I saw it and thought of you and how cool you are."
"Too bad that you cant wear a shirt that says ,'I'm cool.'" I laughed at him.
He gave me a fake face of horror and said, " And why not?"
"Come on, Les. We both know you are not cool. You will never get as close to cool as I am." I smirked and he shook his head.
"Hey, its not my fault im HOT, not cool." He grinned at me.
I scoffed, "Yeah, THATS the reason why your're not cool."
"You got it babe." He winked.
I came back to reality and realized that our friendship would never be the same. COULD never be the same if I kept having these feelings about him. I needed to get over him or tell him how I feel and hope he feels the same way. As much as I hoped he did I couldnt bring myself to think it was true.
Later that night I was in my room getting my homework done when the doorbell rang. Since my dad was most likely already asleep I got up from my desk and walked downstairs to open the door. I got to the door, unable to see who it was I called out, "Who is it?"
I heard Les' deep voice answer, "Me."
I stood frozen. What is he doing here? Ugh. I didnt know what to do. I was still upset about today but he has no idea I was mad at him. And I knew I wasnt ready to tell him why.
"Ruth? Are you going to open the door?" He asked.
I frowned and reached for the doorknob. I slowly turned it swung it open to see Les standing there shaded by the blackness of night. He had something in his hand but I couldnt see what it was. I stepped aside to let him in. He walked through the doorway for me to see his beautiful brown eyes looking at me with concern. My heart lurched at the sight of him. Why did he have to be so handsome? I grimaced. I really needed to get over him. I led him into the living room even though he has been here plenty times before to know where it is. I flipped on the light switch before I plopped on the couch. He came around and sat next to me. Did he really have to sit so close? It was like he was trying to torture me. I sighed and he turned to me.