Xavier | Dark #1 [COMPLETED]

6.

Chapter 6

XAVIER

She was dangerous. She was dangerous without even knowing it.

Ever since I saw her under the covers in my bed I hadn't been able to think of anything else. She was constantly on my mind, every fucking minute of the day. She'd pop up out of no where and even when she was gone from my head she'd pop up in real life and start it all over again.

I wanted to be nasty to her, I wanted her to leave me alone, I wanted to create distance between us because she was making me feel things I fucking hated.

Nobody ever wanted to get close to me once they knew about my personality, nobody cared what I did or where I went but this girl just couldn't stay away from me, she wanted to be the hero and save another lonely soul, but she couldn't.

Whatever she did, I'd forever be lonely, that's who I was, what I was brought up to know. She wanted to get closer and I was annoyed because if she did then she'd cause me to open up and I'm a book that's completely glued; I refuse to open up completely.

It didn't have to be this way, maybe I didn't have to be so alone. But I just couldn't do it, I couldn't seem to want to even when my body was screaming for it, for her.

As soon as I went back to my room, I slammed the door shut in anger. I was angry again, because of a fucking girl. Why did she have to be on my mind?

I took my top off and flung it across the room, not caring where it landed. I then laid down on top of my bed and buried my head into the pillow.

I was almost twenty two years of age and I had no life what so ever. I was always protecting myself but that meant I sacrificed a lot of friends.

Everytime I'd try and be friendly, I'd come across harsh. I didn't want company, I'd rather be alone, that's just who I was.

I got up from my bed with a sigh. As I went to the ash tray across the room, I couldn't help but wonder whether Emily-

Enough. I had to stop my wandering thoughts. It was starting to piss me off.

I needed a cigarette.

I opened the packets and lit one up, I didn't care about the no smoking rules. I needed one.

I didn't smoke a lot, only when I was stressed. I used to because I was stressed and angry a lot of the time. It wasn't a habit, just something which could help me when I needed it. It relaxed me, it brought me back down to reality.

I was pretty realistic and pessimistic anyway, but I liked to know my feet were glued to the floor.

Just as I was about to stub it back into the ash tray, there was a knock on the door. I blew out the remaining smoke. It flew across the air around me and I huffed before opening a window. I then made my way over.

"What?" I grunted as I opened the door. I wasn't in the right frame of mind for fucking chit chat.

"Hey." Her voice flooded my ears and my God she just had to turn up didn't she? Now my body was on hyper aware, my nerve endings were alive and my heart was beating faster. "I was just wondering whether you had some sugar?" She asked sweetly after a couple of seconds without me answering.

Her scent invaded my room and the surroundings. It took me so long to get her scent out of this room and here she was.

"I don't have sugar." I lied, everyone had sugar, it was a vital part of living. I didn't sleep much and I don't know where I'd be without it. I just needed her to go. I couldn't have her here, I couldn't be around her any longer than necessary, it was beginning to piss me off knowing how I was reacting to her.