Cutting

When I cut myself
It's not because
I can
Or because
I want to.

When I cut myself
It's for
The rush of numb delight.
For a way
To know I'm still alive.

I cut myself
To show myself
That the pain in my heart
Can be matched
By the pain in my sliced arms and thighs.

I cry out for a reason
To stop.
I don't want to die
But I don't want to live a lie either.
I know
I'm dying.
-by Ange Exile, The Epic Sidekick