Sip of Assistance

Chapter 18

I thought over his words. He was angry because he missed his assistant, not his friend or lover… not me.

I felt hurt but I let my anger take over instead. “I made sure you had a reliable, hardworking, trustworthy assistant to replace me when I left. I’m so sorry you had to take some sort of responsibility for yourself, Jon, I really am. Heaven forbid you act like a f**cking grownup for once in your life!” My voice was thick with sarcasm and fueled by the hurt that had been bottled up.

“You don’t like Trudy? Then fire her and hire someone else. I don’t work for you anymore so it’s not my problem… And it’s not like she was the only one there to help you out. Seems Danielle did a great job making sure you were taken care of, even before I left!” I yelled, mad at him for breaking my heart and at myself for letting him affect me so greatly.

I noticed the guilt flash back to his face and his demeanor changed abruptly, his tone back to one of pleading. He walked towards me again and I tried to push him away but I didn’t have the energy anymore. My anger deflated and I was left vulnerable and weak. He slowly reached up, cupping my face once again, inches away from me.

“You’re right, Holly. I know you’re brassed off and you have every right to be, but… I… I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I don’t even care about that. Trudy’s fine. This isn’t about her… You left and it was my fault and… I just… I missed you, Holly.” He looked as defenseless as me in that moment and I feared for what he could do to me again if I let him. I didn’t feel like I had the will to push him away as he inched his face closer to mine.

With his eyes closed, he leaned down slowly and kissed my forehead, his lips lingering before tilting my face up more and moving his lips to my chin. I closed my eyes as well, savoring his familiar scent, the feel of his hands on my cheeks, the softness of his lips which I had grown accustomed to in a short time frame.

He moved his lips to my right cheek, nuzzling me with his nose, before proceeding to my left to do the same. He lingered there and once again tilted my head up towards him. I opened my eyes to see his dark blue ones looking back at me with the same expression I remembered from the first time we kissed. Hesitantly, he leaned in to kiss me, probably wondering if I would punch him.

His soft lips were millimeters from mine when the door I had just come through began to open and the sound of drunken giggles pierced my eardrums. I pushed Jon away immediately and looked over to see James helping an extremely wasted Alessandra through the doorway.

“Everything okay, James?” I asked, confused as to how she got so much more drunk in the last few minutes.

He looked up, having not seen me before I spoke and looking relieved at my presence… that is until he noticed Jon, who had a look of frustration aimed right at James.

James furrowed his brows, looking back and forth between Jon and me before answering. “Yeah, I just need to get Alessandra home; she drank a little too much.”

A little, I scoffed internally.

“Of course!” I replied, a little too eager, seeing my way out of the situation. I opened the door of the car and watched as he helped her in swiftly. I expected him to hop in as well, but instead he turned to me.

“What about you? You just ran off, everything okay?” he asked, voice laced with concern again.

“I’m great as always,” I faked a smile, “Should we get out of here?”

“Yeah…” He looked at Jon then walked over and shook his hand. “Jonathon Roberts, it’s nice to finally meet you. I’m James McCalman. I work with Holly now.”

“Yeah, so I heard. You should get used to it, though; Holly has a tendency to just run off,” Jon said in a strange tone, glancing over at me.

All I could think was how awkward this was gonna to be if it continued and how stupid I’d been to let him touch me as if nothing had changed and the last ten months hadn’t happened. Coming to my senses, I interjected, “We have to go. Jon, have great night and give Danielle my best, would you?” I said sweetly.

I didn’t wait for a reply as I entered the limo. James got in right after me and I refused to watch Jon as we drove away. I couldn’t fall back into that trap; things had changed- I had changed. At least I hoped so.

Shortly after pulling onto the freeway, my body began to feel achy and my eyelids grew heavy. I realized the whole party for me had been exhausting, but I had no time to rest my eyes before James questioned me.

"Holls, what was that about back there?" He was expectant, assuming I would answer.

Two questions popped into my head: How could I tell him the truth without ruining everything? How could I lie to him without ruining everything?