Under His Skin (BOYxBOY)

{ Last chapter, oh my. Thanks for everyone who stuck by me through this book! I know it's not the best, it was mainly something i started when i had writers block for my other stories. i never expected to finish it and i know it's been short, but i really enjoyed writing it. thankyou guys, i love you }

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- Kayden -

It should've been me.

Sitting in the waiting room at the hospital, I burried my face in my hands. This was the worst thing that could possibly happen. What was wrong with me? Why did everything I touch turn to fucking stone? I may as well have killed her. I know, I know. She took the pills, it was her decision. But it was still MY fault. It even said so in her suicide note.

                                                                      ~

Kayden,

I can't go on like this. Every time I look at you, I see what I've done to you. I neglected you in the hardest times of your life. I let Daniel hurt you. I let him rape you. I can't live with myself. I can't even imagine what your Father would think. I'm sorry for this. I'm sorry for leaving you but the truth is, you'll be better off without me. Just promise me something..promise me that you'll never let anyone like Daniel ever near you again. Stay with James. He's good for you.

I love you Kayden. I always have and I always will.

Love Mom x

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Now she was fucking with my head. I was confused as to whether she wanted me to mourn over her death or call James. I had no idea what to do. A part of me wanted to call James but another part of me just wanted to cry myself to sleep and never wake up. Then I could be with both of my parents, we could be happy again just like when I was younger.

Crumpling the note up in my hands, I threw it in the trash on the way out.

***

15 minutes of walking around and I finally got to the bar. It was closed now, up for sale. Dunno who would want to live it it now though. Everyone knew what had happened in there. Who could stand in the rooms knowing that I was raped numerous times there? Maybe people who didn't give a shit, about me or anything.

I sat down on one of the booths, staring at my phone as i placed it on the table. I wanted to phone James but then I didn't. I was so confused. I had no idea what the fuck anyone wanted me to do. So I flipped out a coin. Heads I call him, tails I don't.

Might as well leave it all up to fate.

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{ James }

"Hello?"

I hadn't wanted to pick up. But ignoring Kayden would've made me feel a shit ton worse and I would've ended up calling him back anyways. I sat down at the kitchen table, pouring myself another whiskey. Yes, I was depresesed because my underage ex boyfriend had left me.

"James I'm sorry," his voice made my stomach turn. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad. I didn't hate Kayden, I was just pissed. It was like he used me to get away from Daniel and then dumped me straight after.

"You're sorry?" I chuckled. "You know you said that yesterday but turns out you just wanted to fuck me one last time,"

"I'm sorry," he said again. "I was stupid. I hate myself for it. I just..I don't know what to do,"

"Go away with your Mom like you wanted," i told him. "Just don't come bother me. You don't love me. You used me Kayden. You used me to get away from Daniel. Do you know how that makes me feel?"

"James I need you,"

"I need you too but you're not good for me Kayden. I deserve better,"

"I know you do..but I really need you right now," his voice was quivering and it broke my heart. I wouldn't say anything though. I had too much pride for that. "Something just happened..I really need you,"

"Whatever happened, you can handle it." I sighed and downed the whiskey. "I'm going now. Tell your Mom I say hi,"

*

{ Kayden }

Arrogant bastard. Why did I love this son of a bitch?  Because I was a son of a bitch myself, of course. Ugh, he drove me crazy! So I did the only thing I could do. I walked over to the unit and opened the glass cupboard, pulling out a bottle of tequilla. If I couldn't be happy with James, then my next option was to get liver failure.