My Secret Love Affair

CHAPTER EIGHT 

INSANITY BLOSSOMS.

I'm a little nervous about taking off my pants so I can sleep - normal people might wear PJ's but I usually just wear a shirt and undies - but I'm not going to bed with them on so I suck it up and pull them off. I'm wearing a Kirby T-shirt which is totally pink except for the eyes and the smile. It goes halfway down my thighs. 

I sit on the bed thinking about Dwain and Mary-Kate and everything. So much had changed in three days, now I fin myself in love with Dwain and doubting my friendship with Mary-Kate and I'm eating again, more then I usually would, it feels great. 

Mary-Kate comes into the room; she had been in the bathroom brushing her teeth. She sits down next to me on the bed and I know I'm in trouble. 

"Hi honey" she says lightly. She's sitting very close to me but unlike when Dwain does it, it's kind of scary. "We haven't really had the time to hang out just us lately" her hand rests on my upper thigh. 

"we hung out at school yesterday" I say nervously, moving across the bed and away from her hand. 

Mary-Kate smiles at me and says "no silly, I mean just us, just you and me" she crawls across the bed over to where I am. She looks me in the eye and I realise how much danger I'm in. if I don't do what she wants or at least go along with it, she could flip out and kill me. Great, I'm in danger of being murdered by my best friend. Fan-fucking-tastic! 

I do the only thing I can think of and pull Mary-Kate close, intending to hug her or kiss her on the cheek but she takes it the wrong way and kisses me on the lips. The next think I know, I'm lying on my back with Mary-Kate half on top of me, half lying on the bed beside me. I feel her put all her weight on me, crushing me and making me unable to even sit up. my lips are closed but I feel her force them open, I feel her tongue inside my mouth and think I'm going to be sick. I can honestly say that Dwain is a better kisser. 

It's a good thing that my eyes are closed tightly because I hate to think what I would see if they were open. I feel her body moving against mine and am too scared to even breathe, not that I'd be able to anyway. 

My hands are on the bed, trying not to touch anything but she takes on of my hands and puts it on her ass. I know it's a really bad time to notice it but with my eyes closed, Mary-Kate feels a lot bigger then I always thought she was, her ass sticks out really far. It's kind of gross. I try to move my hand but she puts it back in place. 

I think about Dwain as Mary-Kate's hand slides up my thigh and into my shirt. I make believe that it's his hand which is gently moving up my stomach through my shirt. I squeeze my eyes closed tighter, hoping against all hope that when I open them back up, it'll be Dwain who's lips are pressed up against mine, it'll be Dwain who's holding me tightly against himself and it'll be Dwain who's hand is pulling at the bottom of my bra. But it isn't, it's Mary-Kate and I try to push her away but she pulls me closer, crushing me under her weight. 

I feel her hand around my boob and feel like crying but I don't. In my mind I'm begging somebody - anybody - to walk in at this exact moment to save me. Her hand leaves my chest and moves back down my body. At first I'm relived because she's stopping but to my horror, I feel her hand move towards the space between my legs. I feel her fingers at the edge of my undies and I bite down on her lip as hard as I can; she jumps away, pulling her hand off of me. 

"Sorry!" I lie. "I guess I'm just a little nervous" 

Mary-Kate smiles. "Come-on, it's not like we've never done this before" she's about to kiss me again but I put my hand up to stop her. 

"Listen Mary-Kate" I say, my voice is shaking. I'm trying to hold back tears. "I'm feeling really tired right now, I think we should just put this on hold and go to sleep for the night" 

"Don't be silly, it'll only take a minute" Mary-Kate says, putting her hand back on my body. 

"Mary-Kate please. I really don't want to do this right now" please, please, please listen to me. If her hand moves a single inch lower, I'm gonna scream as loud as I can. I'll have no luck pushing her off of me, she's too heavy. 

"OK honey, I can wait if I have to" she pushes herself off me and walks over to her side of the room. I turn around so I'm facing the wall but I wait until she turns the lights off before I cry. 

I don't sleep at all tonight. I'm afraid that if I close my eye, Mary-Kate will get me. I'm afraid of my own best friend and I've got no way out of here until Sunday when my dad comes home. I think very briefly about calling him and telling him what happened but it's Friday night so he'll probably be out.