Niall Horan was my boyfriend. My brain was frazzled and if Josh hadn't been pushing me, I would have completely froze. It all made sense now. The way he was so protective over me, the way his eyes always lingered on me, the way he was so torn up about me not remembering. It's like everything clicked.
I let my long brown hair fall in front of my face as my mind reeled, the fans yells still clear in my ears. I felt like I was discovering things about someone else's life. There was no way I could have a boyfriend and not know. Much less, a boyfriend who's a popstar. Why didn't they tell me? Why didn't Louis tell his own sister? Why wouldn't ANYONE tell me?
"Brook, you okay?" Josh asked in my ear, pulling me back into reality.
"Uh, yeah, but would it be possible to talk to you when we get back to the hotel?" I questioned as he pushed me to the car.
"Course, you sure you're okay?" Josh asked again as we reached the van. The boys had already left.
"Yeah, just realized something." I reassured him.
A smile made its way to my face as I formulated a plan. Revenge is sweet.
"I thought you knew!" Josh seemed genuinely shocked that I hadn't known about Niall.
"Nope, I put the pieces together. I can't believe they didn't tell me though. I mean.. I don't know how to react to this. No one understands how frustrating this is for me! I have no clue what the fuck is happening with my life right now. I feel like I'm trying to live someone else's life. The fact that no one will be straight up with me is the worse. Why can't everyone just be honest with me?" I said through clenched teeth, my hands clenching the pillow from the couch tightly. I felt a reassuring rubbing on my back.
"A lot has happened in the last few years, I think they're scared of overwhelming you. If they told you everything at one time, it'd stress you out. They're trying to think of you. Some of the things that happened affected them just as much as it did you.. They don't want to have to relive it and they most definitely don't want to make you go through it all again." His voice was reassuring, I felt better being able to rant to him.
"Can you tell me what happened?" I asked quietly after a small break. "You know, the reason I'm here? I know that my mum didn't want to tell me, just the thought of it made her choke up. And I know Louis isn't gonna tell me.. And I don't know the others well enough.."
"You know I would, Brook. But to be honest, I'm not exactly sure what it was that happened. No one likes to talk about it.." Josh trailed off, giving me a sympathetic look.
"No, it's okay. I understand." I sighed, knowing it'd be a while before I would find out what happened and why I was touring with them.
"Just try to see it from their point of view. Niall lost his girlfriend in a way, it's hard for you, it's hard for him. Think of what it's like for him." Josh pointed out, and I had to concede he had a point. "Now, did you just want to complain to me or did you need something?"
I started playing with the fringe on the pillow, a smile spreading across my face. "I just wanted to rant." I laughed.
"Well, that's what I'm here for." He winked.
"Where's Brook?" I questioned Louis as I collapsed onto the couch in Liam's hotel room. He was doing a twitcam off on his desk and Harry and Zayn were out partying.
"Either in her room or with Josh." Lou said distractedly, looking quite interested in his MacBook.
"What are you doing?" I asked, already foreseeing the answer.
"Talking to Jules. She says hi." Lou grinned at his girlfriend's name. I couldn't help but feel my stomach drop. Juliet and Louis were perfect for each other but I had never felt jealous of them before. I had Brook. We had always had each other. Even before we were dating we could depend on each other. But now she didn't remember me. She didn't know who I was, what we had done together, how many obstacles we had to go through together.