WARNING: Some cheesiness at the start of the chapter and maybe quite sad but happy in the middle! >.<
Chapter 11: Sleepover
Many days has passed since the incident in Charlotte's party. I was starting to move on from what she said but in all honesty, a bit of me is still hurt. After that, I always questioned myself more than I had ever had. All the boys were trying to comfort me as usual, but that didn't stop me from doubting myself. What if what Charlotte said is true? What if my parents really should be disappointed in me? These are the questions that was running through my mind, the day I had ran away from the party. I didn't really understand why Charlotte still had such an impact on me after many years of her teasing. This was the offence that hurt me the most so far. But what really surprised me was how Harry reacted during the party;
I started to run away from everyone, away from the cause of my misery. But somehow it felt like I was bringing it with me, every stride that I took, every minute that passed, my heart was breaking to pieces from the guilt that I felt. The feeling that I had gotten when Charlotte said that I was a disappointment, a burden even. And it was all coming together, I was the reason my mum died. I was the reason she died but still her last words included my name. I was the reason she died with such disappointment in her eyes, and I am the reason she's now looking down at me probably thinking; why is my daughter such a disgrace?
But she was now in a better place. A place of clouds and angels. A place beyond our imagination; and that place is heaven. Better because she didn't have to keep up with me, to put up with me. Yeah, she IS in a better place; away from it all.
It felt like all that was holding my heart together, was the illusion that I had nothing to do with my mums death. And now I had found out, that I was the reason, that somebody finally found the courage to tell me the dreaded words. Those pieces are now torn apart, crashing against the floor, the sound of shattering pieces ringing in my ear, bringing me down with it. I sobbed all throughout, while my world was slowly coming down.
I let my body melt into the hard floor; the grass still damp from yesterdays rain. Truthfully, I had wanted the floor underneath me to collapse and somehow bring me down to the darkest depths of the Earth; where I belonged.
"Jane?" I heard a familiar voice softly say, placing his warm hands unto my cold bare shoulders. I was shocked from his touch, the warmness of his hands contradicting with my own skin. "Are you alright?"
I looked up at Harry with blurred vision. His blazer was crumpled and dirty and so was his pants. His hair was all over the place, probably from the wind when he was running to chase me. The same hair that I had ran my hands through in. My cheeks burned when I realised this, and suddenly everything felt awkward. Had I really kissed Harry?
"Yeah, I'm okay." I mumbled bringing my face down into my hands once more.
"Look." I felt him sat down next to me, his body warm next to mine. "Don't take any notice of what Charlotte said."
At the sound of Charlotte's name, I felt the urge to ask him a question, " Did you just break up with her?"
He had a sheepish look on his face, it might have looked cute if it wasn't on him. "Uh-"
"You just stood up for me didn't you? I really can't believe that." I shake my head at the thought.
"Hey, I really am not that bad!"
I looked up at him again, my eyes looking straight into his green ones. Their was no amusement left in my eyes, it was filled with seriousness. "And what about the kiss we had shared?"