Chapter 68: Fall
"Kathy, I could explain." I said very fast just so she wouldn't dare counter. It's a good thing that I didn't stammered this time, but the anxiety was very nervous just by hearing the first word.
"H-ha? Eh tinatanong ko lang naman kung anong buhay mo as J-Jake F-Flynn ah?" she answered. I can't see a hint of tone in her voice. Is she angry, or not? Disappointed, or feeling the loathe now?
I couldn't see the hatred, so there's no way she would get into the point of loathing him. Or she just make a good actress, now that she wanted to hide her feelings behind walls?
"Kathy," I deeply murmured, walking outside the mini recording studio and making my way towards her. "I could explain everything. Just please let me." I sounded desperate, and I didn't dare be bothered about that because i really am.
"H-ha? Wala kang dapat iexplain. Nagtanong lang naman ako diba?" now I could sense some bitterness in her tone.
"Really? Katherine you're making this very difficult." I uttered almost cold as ice, I sighed the moment I realized what tone I just used. "I'm sorry. It's just that... You know, that—"
"Baka magalit ako?" she said. "At baka makipagbreak ako sayo?" she hit the bulls eye.
"Yes." I whispered while I looked down. I am a guy who has tears. Tears that would be flowing down right about now, but just like Kathy-I chose to fight them back. "Please, don't." I pulled her in to my arms and hugged her in an instant.
"I won't." she answered.
A sly smile crept up my face. I know she's going to take this seriously for several time. But I'm just happy that she did not break-up with me. I really am!
But all of that crushed when she broke the hug and took a step back away from me. She looked down and from what I saw, she wiped her face from the obvious tear tracks. When she's done she looked up again and formed a smile. A forced one to be exact.
"Kenneth hindi ako makikipagbreak sayo." she said. And suddenly my whole body is starting to regain its usual strength.
"Pero," she continued. This is what I'm afraid of. "Kenneth I need space." her smile already gone seconds ago.
"I fully understand. I'll give you that." I returned her a weak smile. I respect her decision. And this is much better than what I have been foreseeing about the whole time.
"And Kenneth," she called again. "Please wag ka munang lalapit sakin." she stated and that's when she walked away.
I'm stoned in my position. I couldn't move at all, and I just can't find myself running after her. Would it make a difference if I did? She already said herself that she needed space. So I know now that I could perhaps irk everything out of her if I reconsider crashing over.
I knew it. I just knew it.
Oo, matagal ko nang halata. Matagal ko nang alam. Pinipilit ko lang talaga ang sarili ko na isiping hindi sila iisa.
Kaya ba ganun nalang ang nararamdaman kong familiarity kapag nakikita ko si Jake Flynn? Of course. Malamang. Pero kahit ganun, pinilit ko pa rin talaga na isiping they're two different persons.
But no, sudden events proved that to me. Habang wala dito si Kenneth, on-air si Flynn. At kapag naman nandito si Kenneth, hiatus si Jake Flynn. At ano naman ako para hindi mahalata yun? Di ako oblivious.
I did not break up with him kasi... Kasi siguro may part sakin na alam na talaga ang other side of the story kaya natanggap na yun ng isip ko.
Pero meron ding side sakin na nasasaktan pa rin. Una, bakit hindi niya sinabi sakin nung una pa lang. Edi sana hindi na ganito. Sana natanggap ko na sya agad at sana hindi ako nahihirapan nang ganito.
For now, I just need space.
I need to adjust. Dahil nga nalaman kong si Flynn siya, edi marami pa pala akong hindi alam sa kanya. After all, Kenneth is somehow different from Flynn, right? Pero iisa lang alam ko sa kanilang dalawa with certainty.
I love them both. I know I do, that's why I can't let go of him that instant. Ayokong mawala siya sakin. Ayaw. Pero katulad nga nang sinabi ko, I need space. Space and time lang para makapagisip. And I won't even dare to think of that stupid Moving On scheme. I know it wouldn't work very well. Mahirap nga daw sabi nila. And now I understand why.
|Kim Hyun Joong||as Kenneth Verge|
|Im Yoona||as Katherine Villanueva|
|Kim Taeyon||as Alyna Santos|
|Jessica Jung||as Lindsay Gonzales|
|Kim Jeong Hoon||as Jake Anthony Periño|
|Hyuna Kim||as Tricia Savery|
|Wooyoung||as Max Torres|
|Song Ji-hyo||as Andrea Louisse Hernandez|
|Heechul||as Nathan Carlo Verdida|