Rebelsong

Final Day

My eyes draw open. I reach out to block the light that pours in from the east window, without success. The light flows in tints of orange, yellow and pink. Sunrise. I’m late; as usual. Training starts any minute and I haven’t even got up yet. Outside the air is cold and the morning breeze brushes up against my skin. I draw my hand back under my bedroll. For a few minutes I contemplate getting up, weighing up whether it would make much difference. Then I remember Sorne’s scalding expression, the vein that twitches above his eye, the furious expression on his face…I’d better get up.

Slowly I stretch out my hand; the cold air raises goose-bumps along my arm.  The frigid breeze greets me with yet more chilling blasts. I think I’ll just go back to sleep. But sleep doesn’t come. All I see is the increasing size of the mound above Sorne’s eye painted across my eyelids. I draw my body into a sitting position and reluctantly continue to rise.  I wearily step forward on to cold, icy stone. The chilling sensation numbs the bottoms of my feet and I hop awkwardly between feet to warm them up.  In a manner befitting the soles of my feet, I bunglingly avoid letting my feet get too frozen against the stone, while managing to manoeuvre my way to the window and the balcony behind it. I stare down. The courtyard below, stone walls boxing off a small training ground filled with dummies, a stash of weaponry and 12 hysterical students. Each one of them dressed the same, each one of them meets my gaze. Each one of them bursts out laughing.

I see no relief from their hysteria- that is until Sorne steps into the courtyard. Suddenly aware of my clothing I take a small step back away from the balcony. My feet are met by the freezing stone and take me by surprise. My mouth shapes an O and lets out a small, almost inaudible cry. NO! “Seph!” I hear Sorne call out. I anxiously shift forward. His dark, colourless eyes peer up at my ragged long-sleeved shirt and lets out a despondent sigh. “Come.” He mouths; despite no recognisable tone, his gloomy expression and intimidating physique sends more shivers through me than the boreal breeze.

Almost instantly I back from the window and slip my garments on over my present clothing. It itches and chafes but I don’t have time to change properly. Hurriedly, I slip small ankle socks over large feet with quite a struggle, and then pull over the top a pair of light leather boots complete with a broken sole and no traction. But I don’t have time to worry about that now.  I slip out of the room as quietly as I can and hastily descend down a flight of old, worn steps. Fear fills me and thoughts begin to swirl in my mind. Is he angry? What punishment is it this time? I casually walk down a remaining flight of steps and into the courtyard. The others are lined up so I join on the end trying to draw as little attention to myself as possible.

We stand in a line, equal in almost every detail: the same dull green garments, rough leather boots, even the hairs on our arms were all stood on edge. On my skin I feel moist breathe collide with the back of my neck and then the droplets that cool and ooze down it. It’s freezing. It wouldn’t surprise me if someone caught hypothermia, it sounds ridiculous but it’s quite surprising how many people suffer from it high up in this mountain fortress. It catches you in the night when temperatures drop the lowest and then persists to slow you down, freeze your thoughts or even kill you.

With a chilling suddenness, much like everything else, Sorne fills the uncomfortable silence with his deep, booming voice. “Nice of you to join us Seph” he speaks with a tone of mocking sarcasm but nobody dares to laugh. “I trust you had no difficulty in managing to get out of bed on time?” I want to reply but I sense that he’s waiting for me to. “Well, now that you’re here, would you mind reciting the oath of the Seven Orders?” Oh God! I forgot to revise. I don’t know the answer. I’ll have to make it up. But I know if I do he’ll know. The silence has gone on too long and I need to fill it: “I…I… e…um….” I struggle to make more than a few short vowels and noises. “Any time today…” The condescension in his voice is aggravating but I’m on two strikes already. “The Oath of the Seven Orders…” I clear my throat, only now I wish I hadn’t, as now I’m expected to talk as If I actually know what I’m talking about and I don’t: “we join…at the…close… to better understand one another and…Um” I begin to trail off and then am silenced by Sorne’s wretched voice as he strolls past to the front of the line.  “Well… today is placement. And rest assured that your ‘late doze’ will reflect in my final decision.”

 I completely forgot. The only time of the year where attendance and punctuality actually matter, and I get up late. Great! Back to the streets for me: see at the end of our third year of training, we’re divided and sent to Rebelsong Monastery; well at least that’s its name. Upfront it seems like a place of learning and worship, however behind the scenes it’s the base of the Seven Orders, it’s here where we are taught the way of the Seven Orders and taught to fight against the oppressive rulers in Deepglade Forest. Yet they are particularly selective. To even get into the lowest ranking order you have to have completed a whole year’s worth of study and a hell of a lot of hazing. To be honest I’m not that bothered and I wouldn’t have even taken the effort to do as much as I’ve done already if it weren’t for the Orders. It was them who put a roof over my head, gave me food; I feel as if I owe them…I hate owing people.

“Ok, now that I’ve got your attention let’s begin stage 1.” He says before giving a morbid smirk: “Balance, now follow me inside and up to the beam.” Simultaneously we all turn and begin to trail Sorne into the fortress. I follow slowly and try to fall back behind the others. Bats flutter in my stomach. I woke up only minutes ago and I’m already about to begin the balance exam. As I follow up a huge amount of stairs, I catch a glimpse of the sun rising over the edge of the nearby forest, stirring all the creatures within it. It’s still early.

Eventually we reach the top of the stairs only to be huddled together on a stone platform which hangs from the tower. It’s only a few metres wide but the space isn’t too cramped as none of us are particularly big. Ahead of me is another building with an overhanging platform, much like the one I’m on, accept it is at least 25 metres away with only a hardwood beam connecting the two towers. Stood upon this beam, his arms folded, Sorne. The expression on his face barely differs from the scalding glare earlier. “Balance; do I need to elaborate? You cross the beam, you get to the other side, you pass. You fall… you get the picture.” He points down. It’s only now I realise how high up we are, we must be at least three storeys high. Below I can see the courtyard. I do not want to fall.

 The numerous stone steps felt like nothing. The height messes with my mind; I’ve never had a head for heights, ever since Deepglade. I feel dizzy, the towers seem to vibrate around me and wobble from side to side. “Seph.You first.” The crowd of students ahead of me parts to let me through. As I inch forward, I see the looks on their faces; all identical, boys, girls all thinking the same thing. Sorry mate, looks like you won’t make it to Rebelsong; tough shit. To them I’m just another competition for a place at Rebelsong.

Sorne approaches my position, but then jumps past me. I swallow any saliva that’s still in my mouth; my throat is dry and sore. Behind me muttering under their breathes, I vaguely hear someone urging me on, while another shuffles, in what I only assume as an attempt to push me forward. I turn my face to see all the others staring tentatively, and I see Sorne mouthing the word ‘go’.

Taking what could possibly be my last breath; I anxiously place one foot down upon the plank but keep my weight on my other foot. Before I take another step I test the wood. It seems quite pliant. Hopefully it’s sturdy enough; hopefully. I think to myself.  Carefully, I draw my other foot and place it in front of me. At this point I’m still on the beam. I take another breathe and another step, off the safety of the platform and on to the beam itself.The wood bends beneath my feet and it causes me to tilt my body from side to side. I wait a few moments to regain my balance and then take another step. The wood still bends with each step and the further towards the middle I get the more it bends.

Gradually I begin to work a rhythm. Another breathe; another step.  I begin to gain more confidence as long as I don’t look down I’ll be fine. One breathe. One step. Without even noticing I’ve reached the middle. I only now realise how high I am. I stop, fear freezes me. Breathes are now more frequent and I’m hyperventilating.  I look back. I see the anticipation In their eyes, everyone but Sorne. He stands still; cold and emotionless. The only sign of life about him is the motion he makes with his hands: up and down, in and out. Sweat eagerly drips down my brow. My heartbeat thumps loudly in my chest and resounds through my body. Sorne still motioning with his hands, my body rooted in its position watching.  I feel the plank wobbling beneath my feet any second I will fall. I see Sorne’s motion but still don’t understand until he takes a breathe and a realise what he’s doing. I follow his breathing with my own until my breathing slows down. My body begins to feel loose again and I take in the situation. The sun dripping with brilliant light peeks over the head of the forest, the mountains that surround the fortress stand tall and resolute, and the chilling air blows against my skin; the blank below sways and wobbles. I feel my feet slip off from the plank and my body yanks back. Sorne’s face lights up with grief. I fall.