I didn't know what happened pero simula nung last day of taping, he became even sweeter. He sent sweet text messages and called from time to time. He became very special to me. He stopped giving me mango juice but nagpapadala siya ng food sakin. There was this time, I had a pictorial for one of my endorsements, when Fred, Gerald's best friend, gave me Starbucks coffee. Syempre I was totally wondering bakit siya nagbigay. I was about to ask Fred when he already pointed near the door. There I saw Gerald standing. After a while I received a text.
"Nahihiya kasi ako. Ayokong pag-usapan ka. Dito lang ako. I'll be watching you. You look beautiful :)" Yan yung text niya sakin !! Mukhang walang binatbat yung foundation at blush on ko sa sobrang kilig ko that time.
To be honest, natatakot ako sa mga pinapakita niya sa kin. I was afraid that he might be doing that for the sake of pity. I was afraid that I might misunderstand his actions. I was afraid that I might fall for him too hard that I might not be able to stand up. I've learned from my past and I've had enough.
Our premier night came. I was holding my stone when I was in the van. Kinakabahan ako. But when I got out of the van, i saw the most eligible and sought-after bachelor in his elegant suit. I left my stone and greeted Gerald. He led me in and we walked on he red carpet. He never let go of my hand and I felt so secured that I never let go of his too. We greeted some friends and ABS executives hand in hand.
When the movie started, we were very excited to see the outcome of our hard work. I was greatly pleased for the result. It was beautiful. Very beautiful. I was smiling the whole time. I even slapped Gerald on the shoulder when our kilig moments appeared on the screen. I couldn't hide my kilig. I was even blushing.
"Sarah, After ng movie, mawawala rin yan." I remembered myself telling this few months back pero anong nangyari ? Wala. Ganun pa rin ang nararamdaman ko. I thought I couldn't be as happy as this. Napakasaya ko that Gerald came into my life. Tapos na ang movie namin. We did't have to promote anything but Gerald's still there. I still felt his presence and I was very thankful that he never changed. Then I remembered the kid.
Sabi ko noon sa sarili ko, pag nagkita kami nung batang yun sa Gensan, siya ang para sakin. Pero parang hindi na mangyayari yun.
'Sorry." I said holding my stone, facing the mirror.
"Sorry kasi I can't fulfill my promise anymore. It seems like we're not meant. Hindi ata talaga dapat na magkita tayo." Sabi ko sa bato thinking of the kid.
"I don't know if tama tong nararamdaman ko pero eto na to ee. Everything is out of my control. I'm falling for Gerald and I don' think kaya ko tong pigilan. I'm really sorry." i said. Tears began to fall.
That day, tinanggap ko sa sarili ko na, that kid would only be a part of my memory. Na may ibang tao na handa akong alagaan at mahalin. Na handang ibigay ang lahat na mango juice o kahit ano pa mang juice sa mundo maging masaya lang ako. Na bibigyan ako ng lakas at pagmamahal sa kabila ng puso kong may takot. Na magtatanong sa akin tuwing umiiyak ako. Na papawi ng kaba, takot at pag-aalinlangan sa puso ko. At walang sawang papalakpak habang nagpeperform ako. Sana Gerald ikaw na yun. SANA