Just like a crow teasing a butterfly (boyxboy)

Just like a crow teasing a butterfly [chapter21]

Andrew

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, it smells like grass and I'm nice and warm. Why can't I just be happy about that, and have fun like everyone else? We woke up really early this morning, to go for a walk, learning about different plants and stones, and we can do whatever we want until dinner. The others are taking a bath in the warm water, only Eliott and I am left. He's massaging sun block into my back while I'm lying on my stomach in the tall grass. It feels good, oh so good. 

"We could just make him jealous, you know." He whispers into my ear, and I mentally roll my eyes. "You just want some." Eliott laughs. "Maybe, but seriously. You guys make me more sexually frustrated than I am on my own. Just watching the tension between you makes me feel lonely." I sigh. I get his point, though, I do feel lonely. And being close to Eliott like this feels kind of nice. But he is so much nicer. I groan a little. "It's gross really, isn't it? Having sex with your best friend since who knows how long?" I lift my head when Eliott doesn't answer. He looks like he's thinking really hard. "Nah..." He finally says. "I don't think so, I mean, you grow closer, right? And maybe it just isn't enough? Though the sex happened pretty much in a hurry. You didn't really have any time to object."

I think back. Yes, it did indeed happen very fast... But you wanted him so bad. My subconscious reminds me. I feel gross. Very gross. "Okay." I say. "What?" "We'll do it." He stops rubbing my back. "Do what?" "We'll make him jealous. But I don't want to have a relationship with you, okay? The second you start falling for me, I quit." I hear him chuckle under his breath. "And if you start falling for me?" I shrug. "Then I'm in the shit for sure, but I don't think that will happen."

He rises, and helps me up. Then he takes my hand. I frown, confused, as he pulls me to the shore and pushes me into the water. I scream, but giggles as he falls with me, and I start splashing around. He grins, and dives. A little hiss of shock escapes my lips as he licks my lower back, but I make sure I smile widely as he looks at me. We join the others, who are throwing a ball around. Nathan smiles at me. "Feeling better?" He asks, and I nod. "Figured I wouldn't want to miss the fun." He grins, and we all have fun before we decide that the water starts getting cold. 

"We should all put our towels together in the grass!" Karen says, and so we do. Gabe and Karen starts cuddleing and kissing, and I feel a little sting in my chest. Of course I should just tell her that he's not straight at all and that he's slept with me... But I don't think that would be very smart. First of all, she might not believe me. She might think that I've been in love with him forever and that I'm desperate to get him back. Which is partly true, but not what I want her to know. She'd probably kill me. And Gabe would be pissed, and then he'd never kiss me again. As I'm deep in my own thoughts, that's when it happens. A pair of lips are pressed against mine, and in shock, I look straight into Eliott's eyes. He closes them, and keeps kissing me. My first thought is to slap him, but I remember that I'm supposed to play along. I slowly respond. I feel nothing.

Eliott

Someone grips my arm and drags me away. Seth pushes me with my back against the nearest hut, still far enough away so that none of the others can hear us. "What the actual fuck do you think you're doing?" Darren asks me, furious. He and Seth glares at me, and Lily soon joins them. "I kissed him?" I say, looking at them. "We're not blind, you jerk." Lily scoffs at me. "Hey, calm down!" I say, looking at them. "He's okay with it! We're trying to make Gabe jealous." They all glare at me. "What? I'm doing this for their sake!" "No, you're not. If you were, you would never surprise-kiss him like that!" Lily spits the word at me, clearly angry. 

Darren looks at me with a disappointed look. "You can't keep playing with people like this, Eliott. You have to understand the difference. You can have as many one-night stands as you want, but you can't mess with your friends' relationships." I calm down, closing my eyes. Then I nod. "You're right. I will stop now. I didn't think it through, and I'm going to apologize to Andy." Seth and Darren smiles at me, and Lily lifts an eyebrow. "Good boy." She says, then we walk back. Andrew is sitting exactly like I left him, looking partly shocked, partly like he's thinking about something really hard.

"Sorry." I whisper,  and he's looking at me. "It's okay" comes his murmured answer. "We're not doing this any more, okay?" I look at him, trying to read his expression. Andrew nods as he replies me with a weak smile. "So we're good?" I ask, making sure I didn't make him upset. The smile on his face becomes wider. "We're good, Eliott." "Good." And that's where our whispered conversation ends. I look around. Gabe's face expresses shock. "I have to go to the bathroom." He says, then he runs off.

Gabe

I run away, into the hut. I know they'll find me here if they look, but I don't give a damn right now. Locking myself into the bathroom, I dump to the floor. My whole body is shaking badly from my sobs and whimpers, tears running down my cheeks. Why do I feel like this? When Eliott kissed Andrew... I felt like ripping his head off. I know that as his best friend, I should feel protective, but not this protective. It wasn't the kiss that hurt the most, though. It was the thought of Andrew with somebody else than me, and I know it. 

And then there was Andrew's face. He looked confused. What if he's falling for Eliott? And I don't know if he felt the zap from earlier, but I want to be the only one who can make him feel good. I fall over, lying on the floor just crying my heart out. I want to be his boyfriend, not his best friend. Fuck, I want him really bad. It doesn't even scare me any more, I fucking want him. And not just his body like I told Lily, I want to hold him close and never let go. I want to be special to him. 

But then there's Eliott. Eliott who kind of also had sex with him that evening. Eliott who sat with him in the bus, who made sure he took his pills, who rubbed his back with sun block, who dragged him into the water, and Eliott who kissed him. And then, what did they whisper about? Are they dating? Fuck I have a girlfriend, I can't go after a boy who's supposed to be my best friend. Especially not when he probably has a boyfriend. I'm fucked. 

"Are you okay?" Karen's voice sounds concerned. Shit, just what I needed. "Yeah, just, um..." I say, my voice cracking. "Are you sure? What happened?" She asks. Stupid girl, go away. "I feel a little sick" I lie. "Have you tried drinking water?" "No, um..." I rise from the floor, turning the sink on. Then I wash my face with cold water so it won't be tear stained and gross. Then I wipe it off my face and walk into the hut. Karen puts her hand on my forehead. "You're cold..." She says with a frown. "I cooled down my face." I explain, and she nods. "If you don't mind, I think I want to sleep." She nods again. "Do you want to be alone?" She asks, looking at me with big eyes. I shrug. "I don't mind you staying here if you want to." I say, taking my shoes off. Then I go to bed with all my clothes still on. Karen strokes my hair, and I close my eyes. 

I wish it was him.

A/N: Well, at least he admitted it to himself c': Should he get his shit together and break up with Karen, or should he keep her around trying to fall in love with her? *shrugs*