My Father's Beta

Cold

It wasn’t until a couple days after the party that I saw Jim again, that I saw anyone again to be honest. I’d relegated myself to my room to exist alone for a little while, though it was not peaceful. My wolf was scolding me the entire time for leaving our mate, for disobeying him when he asked us to come back to him, she was ashamed of me and my determination to leave home.

My Dad had been in a few times, growing visibly more worried every twelve hours, but I’d shrug it off and tell him that I was home sick which made him scowl and get annoyed enough to leave me alone again after he'd mutter that I am home, so the concept of me being homesick is ridiculous.

I miss my friends, that much is for sure. I could talk to them about this, sort of. I could tell them I’m having guy trouble or something... I’ll call Mitch, she’ll know what to do. I sat up on my bed in the same sundress that I’d worn to the party, largely due to the fact that Jim’s scent still clung to the material and it soothed me and made the bitch in my head shut up for a little while every time I breathed it in.

Looking around my room I could tell that my cell wasn’t in here because I never take the thing out of my bag, so I wandered into the shower in my bathroom and washed the last few days away because, that’s the only way I’ll get anywhere. I have to forget Jim, not that it’ll be easy but it’s my only shot.

When I was washed and dried and dressed in clean clothes again – white denim shorts and a pale yellow singlet, I went down stairs and surveyed the living room until I found my bag on the couch. I leant over the back and rummaged through it until I found what I wanted and started dialling immediately.   

Two seconds later the she answered. “Hey Mitch.” I muttered quietly.

“I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU DIDN’T CALL... wait a minute, what’s that voice? What’s wrong?” She questioned on the alert.

“... I don’t know, I guess I’m just home sick, I miss you.”

“Aw I miss you too, but you’ll be ok, you just have to get used to it.” She told me soothingly, but with the same edge she took everything in her own life.

“Maybe, I’m sorry I didn’t call Mitch, things just got out of hand real fast. My Dad invited the whole damn town for a home coming thing.”

She snorted with her laughter knowing that I hate big parties. “Really? Why?” 

“I don’t know, I just think he was happy that I came back.”

After a little pause she spoke again. “Are you going to tell me what’s really bothering you?”

“It’s what I called for, but I don’t now.”

I sighed, falling back onto the couch, staring at the ceiling. This was stupid, the only reason I called her was to talk and now I can't even manage that?! What's wrong with me?

“What?" She pleaded. "You have to tell me now!”

I laughed loudly at her whining. “No I don’t, maybe tomorrow. I think I just really needed to hear your voice again, you were always the one to keep me grounded.”

“That’s because I’m amazing.” She chuckled.

“You are amazing, anyway I should go.”

“Aw, ok – call me again soon ok?”

“I promise”.

“Good, love ya.”

“Love you too, bye Mitch.”

“See you later Beth.”

The line disconnected and I sighed deeply, trying let some of the pressure in me subside. I need to get away from here for a while, I need to get out and find some peace. With a sudden light bulb of inspiration I ran back upstairs to my room and swapped my underwear for my teal bikini and slipped my clothes back on over it before shrugging on a jacket and flip flops.