Each way I look, there’s someone better looking. More bold features. Brighter smile. I try to keep my smile on, but then I see theirs. It starts as a small hallow hole in my chest. Then I look a different way, and the hallow hole fills with envy. Try the other way. The whole turns into a black hole. A swarming abyss filled with no self-esteem, no self-worth, and desire to be someone, anyone else.
Then I turn to see a mirror. I see flaw after flaw.
I turn my envy of the better looking into hatred of myself.
But, what if;
Each way I look, I see someone like me. Someone who enjoys the sun hates the gas prices. Someone who had a bad day last week, someone eager for the weekend. What if I didn’t hate their bright smile, but returned one? If instead of a hollow hole, I felt a beating heart, just like theirs. And gave a compliment that made theirs beat faster, and mine grow larger. If I turn the other way and hold the door open for the woman who needed a friend. Turn around and helped the gentleman pay for his parking spot, unaware that he had lost his position at work.
Then turn and see a mirror. And see a heart of gold.
Turn my service for them into a love of myself.
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