Chasing The Moments - LS [2012] [1/3]

1

Louis

“Lou?” I hear Liam call.

        I turn around to face him; he's blurred due to the tears filling my eyes. I blink, letting a few of them run down my cheeks as I took a deep breath. I part my lips to breathe in faster. Liam’s face changed from a pained expression to completely concerned, making his way towards me and he wraps his arms around my quivering body.

        He then whispers, “It’s alright, Lou. He’ll be okay.”

        He takes a deep breath and I could feel his body slightly shuddering―unless that's still me?

        “He will be okay,” he repeats, though this time sounding unsure about it. "He's a strong lad."

        I nod on his shoulder, burying my face in his neck and feeling more tears ready to spill. I feel so weak, it’s unimaginable. I could feel Liam’s arms loosen around me, parting away to stare at my un-expression face.

        When my gaze finally connects with his, I'm sure they reveal the ache I resent.

        Harry’s been in the Emergency Room for over five hours. I just cracked at this point. No doctors have come out to say anything to us. They didn’t even come and talk to Anne, Harry’s mum, who’s been sitting there motionless for almost three hours. It must be much harder on her, the pain must be unbearable. This is her son after all, one she hasn't seen for a while as if to top it all off like icing on a cake.

        “How are the others doing?” I ask, wiping at my eyes as I took another deep breath and trying to straighten myself out.

        Liam shrugs, “Zayn won’t stop smoking ‘cause he’s so worried. Niall won’t eat and just sits there motionless like Anne; he's tried to get her to speak for about five minutes then gave up. Your mum is sitting next to Anne, just watching everything that goes on while you’re here, in this corner, wanting to be alone.”

        I nod and sigh, stepping out of his hold and shaking my head a few times.

        I force a grin, “I’ll be okay.” My voice sounds strained, “and so will Harry.”

        Liam nods slowly, “you sure you’re okay?”

        I snort and shake my head, focusing on several breaths before finally replying, “No, I’m not, but, we have to be strong for Harry.”

        “You don’t have to be strong, Louis.” He then says, placing a hand on my shoulder and staring deep into my eyes―something he always does. “You are the closest to Harry. You guy’s relationship has grown so much and feelings have increased and developed to the point where―”

        "Stop, Liam," I warn, cutting him off. I didn't need this right now.

         He stops talking, blinking.

     “You guys just announced that you are dating, to us and management, it’s wonderful," he's whispering, as if he isn't sure he should even press it any longer.

        I roll my eyes a little, stepping away from him. “It’s not wonderful.” I say, my voice rising uncontrollably “Everything went to rubbish after we confessed our relationship, Liam. Everything went wrong.”

        My voice sounded more like a shout once reaching the end of my words, my knees shaking even more. I look away from Liam, my eyes stinging.

        Great, more tears, I think.

     “If it weren’t for what happened with management, Harry wouldn’t have gone down to the bar unattended, gotten wasted and went driving that god-damned scooter of his. We all know that, Liam. We all know that.” I say quite harshly, stating the blunt truth.

        "Louis," Liam says, his voice trailing towards the last syllables of my name. "It was none of our faults, you know that. You also know how management can be; it was just bad-timing."

        I shake my head, feeling the anger build up in my veins. My stare back on his and Liam takes a cautious step back.

        "Bad-timing," I ask, voice rising. "No, bad-timing is when two things shouldn't have been there but couldn't have been prevented. This wasn't one, Harry got drunk and he was stupid. This could have been prevented. That is why we shouldn't let eighteen year olds drink!"

        Before Liam could say anything and before I could say something else I could regret, I turn around from him and started walking away.

        I just want to be left alone right now.

        As I turn the corner of the hospital hallway, more tears raced down my cheeks. I can't help myself but think what if I’d never see Harry’s beautiful smile, those deep green eyes or the brown curls I've fallen for so bad, ever again.