Did you ever wonder how it feels like to be free?
To be really free and have control over your own life…
Do things you want or go to different places…
And of course say whatever it is your thinking without giving a damn about others.
Sounds good right?
This is all I ever wanted, like most people: freedom.
Truthfully, I’m not like most people. I’m not like the usual 18-year-old high school girl that centers her world in boys, chick-flick movies or the latest version of a cherry red lip gloss. No. I’m not even close to being like that. I don’t have friends, I’ve never been to a party, and I definitely haven’t worn designer clothes.
I guess I’m just me. I don’t care what I wear, how I look, or what others think of me. I’ve long since closed myself to the evilness of the society.
Why? To put things bluntly, I was thrown away by my parents. They left me at some run down orphanage when I was just three months old. I was lucky the people from the orphanage didn’t think twice about taking in a three-month-old baby. I was there left on their front steps, huddled in a basket, and wearing nothing but a necklace with the name Anne etched on it. There wasn’t even a note; nothing. Just Poof! And there I was completely innocent and unaware of anything and everything. I wished with all my heart that it was still the case now. But of course it wasn’t.
As I was growing up, little by little, my innocence started fading. I was awakened to the unfairness and harshness of life. I could never really relate well with others even when I was still a kid. I settled with playing by myself; I never spoke to others willingly and I never trusted a soul.
I was five when I first got adopted. I could still remember the look in the couple’s faces as one of the staff of the orphanage ushered me towards them. They hugged me and told me that from then on, they would be my mom and dad. Those very words seemed foreign to me at that time. I spent three years with them and each year felt the same as the previous. I never really felt a difference; I still felt lonely. And then one night my mom and dad never came back. They said they would, but I guess they didn’t really love me. Just like my real parents, they threw me away. Great right?
I returned back to the orphanage and after a year, a new couple decided to adopt me. I was a little hopeful this time. I thought everything would be different and maybe, just maybe, I would finally have a home and a loving family. I never knew back then how wrong I was. Once again, I saw the look on the couple’s faces as they approached me and hugged me. They told me that they would be my new mom and dad. Yeah right.
My sweet couple turned sour. In just the first few weeks that I stayed with them, I instantly wanted to go back to my orphanage so badly. Let’s just say that they managed to send me to the worst possible school in our city. It was the type of school where there were bullies who just picked on me and the other loser kids for fun. Oh, and as a bonus, I often got hit by my so-called-father once in a while with no apparent reason; boredom maybe?
I don’t want to describe all the horrible and gory stuff that happened to me. I’ll spare myself the drama and just skip that part. All I know is that I hated each and every moment of it. Let’s leave it at that.
As ironic as it may sound, I stayed there for about nine years. Yes, nine long horrible years. I still don’t even know how I survived to this day. The only thing that kept me going was the thought that someday, I will be free; free from this world’s cruelty.
My name is Anne Clarke.
And this is how a not-so-normal-life of a girl goes.
SUPPOSED TO BE
“Anne, Honey? Are you okay?”
Linda called out at the other side of the door.
“Yeah, I’m fine….door’s open.”
I answered back with a voice that was a little bit hoarse; must be from lack of sleep.
Linda’s a lawyer. And she’s been helping me out for months now; coming up with game plans and everything regarding my emancipation from my foster parents. I have also been staying here in her apartment ever since I ran away from home. I just turned eighteen last week which enabled me to legally file for emancipation.