I don't get it. Part 1

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::Jacob POV:: 

I. Hate. Myself. I just want to crawl under a rock and never come out. She will never forgive me. I know it. I can't believe I did that to her. Again. They basically smashed her head under their feet. Seeing all that blood run down her head.....it made me want to die. Brianna told her what we did. I'm not proud of myself at all. I wanted Charlene to be my first. Briana said if I didn't do it she would have her friends gang r*pe her. I couldn't let that happen. The thing that made me more digested at myself is that I didn't hesitate to do it. Not once did I think of Charlene until it was over. My mind was overcome with guilt. I backstabbed her. Twice. I know I'm gonna have a lot of karma for doing this to her. I know I can never have her back. They made me put my hands on her. I feel so ashamed. I promised my mother that I would never put my hands on a female. The worst part is that I gave her a black eye. I know I'm gonna rot in hell. Her bloody face kept replaying in my mind. Seeing that blood on her beautiful teeth, all over her precious body. One thing that I hurt me is that she didn't really shed any tears. She took it like a G actually. It scared me how emotionless she was. When she told me to hit her I wanted to run out of there. She told me she deserved it for trusting me. I hate that I made her think that. As we walked back to the party I noticed that Jaden was gone. I wonder where he went off to... 

::Charlene POV:: 

Everything was getting more and more blurry as the person was walking with me. I didn't even bother trying to fight them considering that I was so weak. "Your gonna be ok" the person said. The voice sounded somewhat familiar. I knew it was a male.  They sounded as if they were crying. I felt a slight breeze so I already knew that we were outside. They kept walking for a little while longer then they came to a sudden stop. I heard a door open and the person kept walking with me in their hands. I cracked my eyes open but it hurt too much from when Jacob punched me. Stupid mofo. I eventually stopped trying and just kept them closed. I could feel the person carrying me go up some stairs "you're still beautiful" I heard them say. Lies. Who ever this is is already getting on my nerves with this 'your beautiful' crap. The person finally came to a stop and I felt them lay me on what seemed to be a bed. I felt them take off my shoes and toss them on the floor. There was a soothing silence. I opened my eyes and realized that I was in a unfamiliar room. I looked down on what I was lying on. I saw the most biggest bed. I swear it could fit more then 3 basketball players.   

I saw a door open and I saw............Jaden? (you guys guessed it. Give yourself a pat on the back :P) I immediately was scared out of my mind. I started trying to get out of the bed but he came over and softly took a grip on my arms making me stop. "Don't be scared. I won't hurt you. I promise" he said softly. He sounded just like Jacob. That made my skin crawl. I, again, was utterly confused. He just helped Briana and them  beat my as* and now he's...helping me? How stupid does he think I am? I still was trying to get away even though my body was in a tremendous amount of pain. "Stop it Charlene. I'm trying to help you!" he said holding me tight. I stared at him as I calmed down. He was so...handsome. He was adorable even. No Charlene. He's one of them. He's made your life hell. "Why are you trying to help me when you just helped them beat me up?" I asked a little angry and frustrated. Blood was still coming from my mouth and head. "We can about that later." he said he grabbed my waist and put me back on the bed. "Stay here." he demanded. No the hell this n*gga didn't! (sorry guy, the more you get to know me the more of a potty mouth I become) I didn't feel like arguing so I just listened to him. I just laid there.  He came back with towels and a cup full of what looked like water. He walked over to me. and knelt down to my level. "Here, put some in your mouth, then let it sit, then spit it out. Ok?" he said softly. I looked into his beautiful brown eyes. The way he was looking at me was weird. I slowly nodded  head and did what I was told. He gave me salt water to stop the bleeding. After that he took a towel and started to wipe the blood from my mouth and face. He put his hand on my face and I flinched. "Calm down. Breathe" he said in a soft deep voice. I stayed there, just staring at him. He slowly started to wipe my blood off. He kept staring at my lips. Ummmm ok then? He got my blood all over his hands and shirt and he didn't seem to care. "You have my blood all over you." I said pointing it out. "So?" he said simply while still cleaning my face. "Soo...aren't you disgusted?" I asked furrowing my eye brows. "No" he  said plainly. "Why not?" I said tilting my head to the right. "You ask to many questions" he said smiling. He's never smiled at me for as long as I've known him. He would on give me evil smirks sometimes when Briana pulled her tricks on me. His smile was beautiful I have to admit. He put his palm on my face wiping the last of blood from my head. "Lay down" he said as he softly pushed me down on the bed. "Is it ok if I lift up your dress?" Excuse him? I looked at him stupid. "So I can clean the wounds on your stomach." he said. I was wearing leggings under my dress so he wouldn't see much but i was still thrown off. "Uh o-ok." I said stuttering. What's wrong with me? He slowly lifted up my dress. His eyes wondered my body. He bit his bottom lip. It gave me chills. He came closer and stared at my stomach. He came out of his trance and came even closer. He put his hand on it. I flinched again. "Do I scare you or something?" he asked raising an eyebrow. "Yes." I said being honest. "Why?" he asked. Is he stupid or? "Do you not remember what you and your little friends do and just did to me?" I said getting a little angry. He looked at me. I could see the guilt in his eyes. He put his head down "I'm sorry" he mumbled. I didn't answer him. I just took a deep breath. I could feel him staring at me. To avoid him I put my arm over my eyes. He breathed heavily and began cleaning my wounds on my stomach. It hurt a little but I showed no emotion towards it. After he finished he took my arm off my face. Before he could say anything he saw my hand with the cuts on it. You know, where it said "B E A U T Y"? Yeah. He looked at me with caring eyes. "Don't ask." I said trying to get up. He lightly pushed me back down. "What are you doing? I'm going home." I said with a soft voice. "You're not going anywhere. Not with how hurt you are." Again, excuse him? My mom is on a business trip for 4 weeks so she wouldn't be worried. But, why in the world would I want to stay in the house of one of my bullies? Yeah. I thought so. "And why exactly do you care?" I asked him. His expression was emotionless "More reason then you should know" he said. Oh well. I guess I have to sleep here because I'm to weak to argue and frankly he just won't let me leave. He stood up and took of his shirt. Mary, mother of God! I think i just might die. I couldn't help but stare. He walked up close to me and went to my ear "stare any harder and your eyes might just pop out" he whispered into my ear and then all of a sudden he licked my earlobe! My stomach dropped. I just stared at him in disbelief. As he turned around and walked out of the room, he winked at me. I tried not to make anything of it. He might be trying to reel me in so he can trick me just like Jacob. That name is starting to irk the hell outta me. From now on I'm gonna say "Him" Ok? Ok. Jaden came back with some clothes. "Here you go?" he said handing me the clothes. "Why you give me these?" i asked him. "Do you want to sleep in a bloody dress?" he asked smiling with a raised eyebrows. I rolled my eyes playfully and didn't say anything. "Um can I take a shower, please?" I asked. He nodded his head and took my hand. "Come here." he said. He helped me walk to the bathroom. "This is it. Call if you need anything." He said. "Ok" I said barely audible. I felt him come closer to me and go behind me. I could feel his warm breath on my neck. He softly put his hands on  my shoulders and ran them down my arms. I tensed up. "I'll be waiting" he whispered in my ear then blew into it. Why is he acting like this with me? I thought he hated me for whatever reason. I don't get it. He just help his friends give me a beatdown and after that he takes care of me? My life never makes sense. I can't let him get to me. I'm not trying to get hurt a 3rd time. I turned to face him. He gave me this really weird stare almost as if he was....eye r*aping me. I pushed him out of the bathroom. "Privacy needed" I said closing the door. "You can't hide from me for that long." he said smirking. I didn't say a word and closed the door shut. My body was still hurting. I carefully took off my dress. I looked at all the marks on and bruises on my body. I let a single tear go down my cheek. I turned on the shower. I walked inside and let the water hit my body. It burned so bad, but like always. I didn't care. Everything started to replay in my mind. Those words.....when Brianna told what her and Jacob did. I felt like I had just been stabbed. I actually loved him. Charlene, suck it up! He didn't love you for obvious reasons! Your fat, your ugly and your stupid! Period! I let some more tears fall down my face. After a while I finished my shower. Got out and wrapped the towel around myself. I slowly walked to my now worst enemy. The mirror. I looked at my face. I was shocked. I had a busted lip, black eye and marks and cut all over my face. That's what I get. Him. He did this to me. In yet I did this to myself. Letting him in. I'll forgive him, but I swear I will never talk to him ever again. As of right now he's DEAD to me. I'm done. You fool me once shame on you, you fool me twice...shame. on. me. I examined my disgusting face. "Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who's the most ugliest, fattest and stupidest of them all?..........you are." I said pointing at my reflection.    I let more tears run down my face. I was so angry at myself. I got tired of looking at myself so I put the clothes on, went out of the bathroom and went back into the room that Jaden was in. He got up when he saw me. "Finally you take the longest sho-" he paused and looked at my face. I was trying to avoid his gaze but it didn't work. "Have you been crying?" he asked getting closer. "No." I lied while backing up. "Then why are you eyes red?" he asked coming closer. "Leave it alone."  I said backing up more with my voice shaky. "Listen, I know that your having a lot of trust issues right now. And I know I haven't always been nice to you, but will you please just talk to me?" He sounds exactly like--nevermind. Before I could say anything he pulled me closer to him. I was shocked...only because I caught off guard though. He pushed my wet hair away from my face and stared into my eyes. Almost as if he was looking into the soul. I got lost in his beautiful brown eyes. I got a hold of myself. I moved my head away. "I'll talk to you in the morning" I said lying. I just want him to leave me alone. He sighed "Ok" he said softly. He kissed my cheek so delicately. Why does he keep doing that?!  He is suppose to hate me! I think. I want to confront him about it but I really don't at the same time.  "How about we go to bed then?" he asked stroking my cheek. What. the. actual. F*ck?! I softly pushed his hand from my face. His bed and another one on the floor. I looked at him. "I know you won't be comfortable sleeping in the same bed with me so I'll take the floor and you can take my bed." he said rubbing my back and smiling a little. Maybe I am dead. Since when was he this nice? The guilt must have been eating him alive and he didn't want to go to hell. Oh well. Like I said....too late. I nodded my head slowly while looking down. He went to turn off the light. I slowly walked to the bed and got under the covers. "Uh, where's your shirt?" I asked staring at his gorgeous body. "I sleep shirtless" he said staring at me. He keeps staring at like he's trying to tame himself in some sort of way. Maybe he's trying not to kill me. The pleasure would be all mine..... (To be continued) 

You tell me if Jaden smith got on you like that you wouldn't pounce :) 

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