A/N: Hey, guys! This is my first story, and I'm hoping you like it! This is just a small introduction into the exciting story of Juliet Cooper! Just to let you know, I will post the next chapter in a few minutes, but after that I am only going to continue writing if I get feedback! SO COMMENT, VOTE, SHARE, LIKE, WHATEVER <3 Thanks a lot!
Rule number one: don’t get attached.
Becoming attached to people meant you trusted them; trust was created to be broken. Being broken meant you were weak—and I was anything but weak. Over the years, I’d built up a hard exterior—I’d been broken once, and vowed to myself that I’d never get close enough to anyone to become that hurt again.
His name was Brendon, and he was the love of my life. I had never doubted that I wanted to marry him; he was absolutely perfect, and the only thing I could seem to compare him to was that of an angel. We were friends at first—eventually, we started to date, and I was happier than I ever had been before, despite all the pain and fear splashing down on me. He was reliable. Brendon seemed to make all the pain fade away like it had never happened; there wasn’t a moment that passed with him by my side that I didn’t thank God for his existence. Brendon was everything I ever needed—he was the one that made jokes to cheer me up when I failed an exam, the one who kissed me lightly on the lips when it was my birthday. He made me smile, no matter how horrible I felt or no matter what reminders of my past crept up on me. Brendon made me a better person—the kind of person I wanted to be. He was the first person I had sex with, and despite his need for it, I happily gave it to him, despite all the fear that welled up inside me, with no regret. Brendon was, quite simply, what I would call my soul mate. But, then, things came crashing down; his lies broke out, after two years of hiding. He’d cheated on me with my best friend, and she told me about it—a year and a half afterwards—saying that she felt so horrible, she couldn’t hide it anymore. My heart was completely shattered, completely speared in half by this person—this angel—that I had been loyally obedient to. In my sadness, I broke up with Brendon—although, throughout all of that, I never once was angry with him. I didn’t question his decisions—I was just upset I wasn’t enough for him. Throughout all that shit he put me through, I was still furious with myself because I didn’t satisfy him. That’s how in love I was. I’d been positive he was the one I wanted, and I only broke up with him because I thought that was what I should do—not what I wanted to. I still wanted to be with him—to cuddle him, kiss him, hug him, have him to rely on. But, now I was alone.
I never spoke to my ‘best friend’ again. Soon after, I heard that she and Brendon had started dating—that really seemed to finish me off. I became sadder than I ever had before, and started to hurt myself; I would cut my wrists, desperate to die—although I never would; my foster mom would become so upset, and I owed way too much to her to just kill myself—and burn myself by scorching metal hair clips over a lighter and pressing it to my flesh. I dropped out of school, so upset that I had to see both Brendon and my friend, Samantha, every day, kissing in the hallways and holding hands in class. I was overcome with depression, and everyone seemed to notice it but Brendon. I wanted him back so badly, but he refused to even speak to me. I was unwanted.
So, I went to a different school. I made acquaintances there—but, I was careful not to become attached to them, and give anyone the title of friend—and grew up a bit. I moved on, and grew out of the depression. However, despite me moving on, I knew if Brendon came up and spoke to me, I’d fall madly in love with him again; if he asked for me back, I’d go back to him in a heartbeat.
I wasn’t happy—I hardly believed I could be as happy as I was with Brendon ever again—but I wasn’t sad anymore. I was better, but not perfect. Hell, I was far from being perfect again. Perfect was with Brendon. Perfect was so far out of reach, it wasn’t a possibility anymore.