Bad Meets Good

Get Mad At Me

“So, what do you want for Christmas sweetie?” my mother’s voice questions from the dinner table. I set my plate down on the table and take a seat across from Harry before shrugging my shoulders. He softly smiles over at me and I return it even though it’s fake. My whole mood is fluctuating.

My dad takes a sip out of his drink while looking in my direction with a look of curiosity etched on his face. “I don’t really want anything for Christmas, mom.  You guys already know that I’m not a picky person so I’ll be grateful for whatever you guys end up getting for me.” I reply while bringing a forkful of food into my mouth. My parents nod their heads while frowning and I feel like rolling my eyes at them. It’s the same scenario every year with me giving them the same response and they still haven’t caught on yet. It’s frustrating but it’s starting to get less and less each time every year passes. The one tangible thing I want for Christmas is something that they most likely won’t be able to give me and it slices through my holiday spirited heart every year including right now.

It doesn’t even feel like Christmas in this house.

“Well, is there anything that you could possibly think of right now that you might want?” my dad probes. I sigh and place my cup back on the table and Harry looks over at me, waiting, for my response.

“Umm…maybe some perfume? I’m running low on it.” I say while picking at the food on my plate. I don’t even feel like eating the rest of it.

My dad smiles while turning his attention towards Harry. “So Harry, what are you planning on doing for the holidays?” he questions. Thank goodness the attention is off of me for the time being.

Clearing his throat, he opens his mouth to speak. “My friends, London, and I, all decided on going up north to a ski resort for a couple of days. None of us know how to ski so it’ll be a seemingly interesting experience for all of us to step out of comfort zone and try something new for a change.”

“A ski resort?” my mom retorts bewilderingly.

 Oh shit.

“Sweetie, you never mentioned anything about this to us. Mark, did you by any chance know about this beforehand?” she questions while glancing at my dad momentarily. He shakes his head no and she looks over at me with a perfectly arched eyebrow. “Care to explain yourself, London?”

 “I didn’t bother telling you guys because all you ever care about at the end of the day is your stupid job and never me!” I exclaim a little bit too loudly. Everyone looks at me inexcusably and I don’t care anymore.

“London, you don’t what you’re saying.”

“Yes, I do dad! Every single time you guys go away, you guys never take my feelings into any type of consideration and it’s been happening for the longest. Do you know how it feels to come home after school, looking forward to seeing your parents, and they’re not even there but there is a note left on the table?” I voice while wiping at my eyes with the back of my hand. The last thing I don’t want to do is to start bawling. “Or having to spend every Christmas for the past nine years without any parents? You guys know how much I loved Christmas and I used to wake up soo excited on Christmas day when I was younger, running down the stairs in my pajamas along with disheveled hair, to see all of the gifts that Santa had gotten for me and have my heart shatter into a million pieces when I walked into a desolated bedroom, in which you guys were supposed to be in! It’s depressing and none of the gifts ever made up for your absence, if anything, it made me miss you guys ever more.” I shout and I feel like smacking myself in the face when my voice cracks. I look over at my mom and sigh as she looks as if she’s on the verge of crying while Harry and my father both have a saddened look on their face.