I Love You, I Love You Not

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i want to thank those who have been reading my book and supporting me.

this chapter is for you

luv u guys <3

Chapter 4

Do I like Drake??? Like do I love him? I'm not sure. I've never felt a loving feeling before, since I've never had a parent or any type of 'guardian' figure in my life. But, maybe the way I feel about Jake is a loving feeling, as in a brother-ly sister-ly type feeling. Sure, Drake's romantic, funny, interesting but is he the right guy. I know you're probably wondering, "Why the hell would you ask that? You're twelve for god's sake!" But, what happens if I miss this opportuinity, if it even is a good opportuinity. I don't want to be some loner that is like 80 with no family, friends and just has a bunch of no-good cats. Not that I don't like cats, sorry to be offensive to those cat-people out there. But I'm just not a big cat person. I'm more of a dog person. *Sigh* Maybe I should just dump Drake already. I didn't feel sparks when he kissed me or anything like the stories always say. He just left me wishing for a little bit more, like a longer kiss. Nothing too touchy. Is that good? Bad? I seriously need some advice here. UGH. I groan and pull my hair in frustration. Relationships cause a LOT of stress. I mean seriously, should a twelve year old be thinking this? NO. Exactly.

I decide to ask advice from Hattie. She was more experienced since she was 14 like Drake. Maybe she would know how to handle this kind of situation. I log on to Facebook and see if Hattie is online. Nope. She's not on. Damn. I go to her wall and post,

"Hey Hattie, how's your life? Mine's hectic. I recently went out with this dude, Drake? YA. Well he's cute and funny and romantic, but I'm not sure if we should continue going out. I never 'loved' someone before, well other than Jake. Anyway, I need some help figuring out what to do? Help Me? Thanks so much!"

I hope Hattie's the right person to go to. Like a person, that won't be jealous, or won't be like gushing about how I'm so lucky, and they wish they were me kinda thing. I just want her to be straight to the point and tell me if I should continue going out or not.

I leave the shop, deciding to take a walk to do some thinking since I had nothing better to do.

 I remember, being told that people used to take a flower and just pluck each petal off, saying, "I love you," then on the next petal, "I love you not." and the last petal and last thing you said is what your decision is. Hmmm.....

I walk to the park, and someone bumps into me from behind.

"Ooof." he says.

"Woah, woah. Who do you think you are, hotshot?" I threaten.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean too. It's totally my fault," he said adorably. "Are you okay?"

"Ya, I'm fine." I said wondering how to test his loyalty. "Watch where you're going, kid." I gaze into his milky hazel coloured eyes.

"I'm so sorry." he glanced down at his shoes, ashamed, his auburn hair brushing down toward the ground. I can't help but realize how cute he is. His hair is like Justin Bieber's and his eyes are so milky and hypnotising. Snap out of it, Sam. You have a boyfriend. But a little voice in my head asked me, you were questioning him even BEFORE you met this guy. Think whatever you want.

"Oh its okay." I agreed sensibly, batting my eyelashes and acting like a slut. What the hell, Sam? You are not a flirt. Nor are you a girly-girl. Stop acting like one.

"Thanks." he says.

I glance at him questionably. "For accepting my apology?" he said reading my mind.

"Oh." I answer stupified. "Um... your welcome?"

"No probs." he said.

"Okay, bye I guess."

"No wait! Uh.. do you have anywhere to be right now?"

"Noooo...." I say slowly. "What do you want?"

"You want to just talk?"

"Sure."

He guides me over to a bench and motions for me to sit.

"I'm Trek." he says.

"Sam." I say with a nod of a head. But inside, I am just bubbling. Trek! What an adorable name. I silently vow to myself to name my future child (if its a boy, obviously) Trek.

"I'm thirteen."

"Twelve." I say, thirteen? What a perfect age. Just one year age difference! Everything about him seems so perfect. I sigh internally.

"My dad is owner of Naughtry Furniture Inc. My mom is a fashion designer." Wow, impressive, much? Wonder what he's doing wandering in a park, he must be worth like a million dollars. I passed a Naughtry Furniture shop once, and wandered inside. Everything there, must be worth like at least $8,000, even a simple dining chair that is plain black.

"My parents died." I said simply.

"I'm so sorry." he said with a shake of his head. Wow, he must've been brought up real well too, to have such nice manners. All the boys I know are usually arrogant, self-centered jerks. Not too offend anyone of course.

"Ya, but I didn't really know them, so it didn't really hurt that much when they died."

"Were they business people? Traveling all the time?"

"No. They didn't want me so tossed me into an orphanage and then I went to many foster homes. At 8, my parents died." I said. I wondered why I was telling him all this, I just met him. I've known Drake longer than this and I don't even know if he has parents! Who knows? He could be an orphan like me.

"Oh. What a shame. If they knew what a beautiful, nice, knowledgable girl they would have, I bet they would never have thrown you away." Awn, he's so cute.

"Naw. I bet they still would. Anyways, I'm not nice or knowledgable."

"Oh of course you're knowledgable. You know how to protect yourself from strangers like me, by cautioning them first, asking questions and testing them. You are super street-smart!"

"Why thank you." I said surprised at his openess.

"Your welcome. Anyways, what school do you go to? Unless I suppose you don't go to school?"

"You're right. I don't go to school. I'm a model, if you're wondering how I can survive. I am currently living in an alleyway and is supported by my manager, Leanne and my friend who's more like a brother then anything else, Jake."

"Oh. Well, I must seem like a rich, arrogant, spoiled brat to you then. Who has worked so hard to survive. I'm just trash. You're so honest and loving." he admited.

"No you're not a rich, arrogant, spoiled brat, you're a nice, polite, well-raised, adorable boy." I gasped surprised that I called him cute in front of his face.

"That's so nice of you." This conversation has suddenly turned into a complimenting competition.

"Your welcome. I'm sorry, but I have to get going or Jake is going to start worrying about me. Thanks for the nice chat, with such a nice, polite person though. I haven't had one of those for a long time."

"Your welcome. It was nice meeting you!" he called as I hurried away.

I ran back home, surprised at my weird encounter today. Huh. My life has suddenly gotten so much more interesting. First, Drake, now Trek? Cool. But the thing is, Trek is an amazing guy and deserves someone very loving and sweet, but so does Drake. I think I love Trek, but Drake is fantastic too. The problem now is, who should I choose???

Will I choose the right guy? Or will my future be ruined because of this day?

We'll just have to wait and see.

so do u like trek? love him? give ur opinions id love to hear them

pic on side is of him he's just so awesome.

played by Ty Wood

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