I'm Vaguely Here

I fell down several steps, and scraped my knees on the gravel at the bottom. It felt like a nightmare, something that I was very familiar with, but ten times worse, because I knew it was real. I don't know how I knew it was real, but it definitely was. The pain was real, and the blood running from my arms and knees was a proper blood red. I tried to stand, but there was a physical force preventing me from rising. I moved my eyes frantically around, and turned my head. Still no one. I looked up to see something hovering above me, supported by the same type of force that was keeping me on the ground. I couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman, I couldn't even tell if it was human!

I woke up. I couldn't remember anything. I couldn't remember my own name, I couldn't remember my family members name or anything. I could remember my dogs name though. Andy. I took in my surroundings. I was in a plain room. White walls, simple cane furniture. A chair, a two seat couch and a bed. But there was something out of place. Paintings covered the walls, but they were unearthly. Nothing like anything I'd ever seen. They were all brightly coloured, but as I watched they changed positions. The colours dulled and the pictures switched, slowly fading into each other. “What is this place?” I said to myself.

“He's awake!” a females voice said. She seemed happy, almost ecstatic, and it seemed as if it was for me. “Don't move. It'll only worsen your condition.” She continued.

“What “condition”,” I asked. She replied saying I was suffering from severe hallucinations and that I had to stay with them at this safe-house for about 3 days.

“We should just tell him now. It will save him weeks of bullshit,” a mans voice mumbled, just loud enough for me to hear.

“Who are you guys! I've been shoved in here, I don't know who I am, let alone what's actually happening around here!” I exclaimed, “I don't particularly feel very well here!” I went strangely dizzy, I never went dizzy, which made it even more unusual. Then I remembered. I remembered the cutting earlier that day, and falling down the stairs. I looked at my arms and saw that they were clean, the cuts just thin lines on my pale skin, and my knees were completely normal, as if nothing had happened. The two people were arguing, and then, amazingly, I was back at home, but it was a Monday morning. A normal day. I remembered everything, except for what had happened yesterday afternoon.

I heard my mum walking towards my room. I lay back down to cover my arms, where the cuts were still there.

“Wake up!” She yelled at me.

“All right, all right. I'm getting up.” I replied sleepily. She left the room, and I stood up. I got dressed, made sure I had my jumper on, even though it was twenty-five degrees outside. I ate breakfast, got everything ready for school, picked up my iPod and phone, and started on the walk to school. I felt like I was having a good day today, and as I put my headphones in my ears, I put some music on. It was Panic! At the Disco today, and I started humming along to the lyrics.

I got to school, and my mood was ended. She was standing there. I should have known. But she seemed unhappy. She averted her eyes and turned her head away. I heard mutters around me, talking about me.

“That Robert kid. He's just standing there. I think he was looking at Ailish,” I heard a boy in my class saying. I'm amazed that he actually knew my name. I walked off to my locker, got my books and walked to class. As usual, I went to sit down in the back corner, but my spot was occupied, by none other than Ailish Cooper. I looked at her eyes. They were a bright blue, like the sky, and red-rimmed. I realised that she'd been crying. She looked up and met my gaze, and I swear I saw her smile. A sad smile, only for a second, but it was there, and it was for me. I think she finally realised how it felt to be me.