Life Lines

31: Speechless

Chapter Thirty-One

I didn't know what to say. The whole time I'd been in love with him and he was hating me. Did he hate me now?

"Wow," I whispered. I've been so blind. "That—hurt worse than I thought it would."

"Tally..."

I took a step back. "Stop calling me that."

"You're taking it the wrong way..."

I looked down at my feet to hide the tears that had to be evident in my eyes. "I want to go home now. Please."

My voice sounded so small, so unlike what I was used to hearing when I spoke. Then again I felt small. Everything I thought true was false. Everything I hoped for unknowingly would never happen. This was what it was like to have your reality shown to you. The whole time...

His fingers came into view as he tried to take my hand. I didn't know what I was doing but I reacted in a way I never had before. My feet shuffled me back and my hands and arms spread out in a surrendering gesture.

"Don't touch me. Just..." As I looked up at him, an unbidden tear trickled down my face. "Take me home. If you can't then please, tell me where to find someone who can."

"Sweetie."

The word was spoken in a soft, sympathy filled voice. I didn't need to look in order to know who it belonged to. At the same time, I felt another tug on my left wrist and the soft brush that usually came with the changing of the lines.

Again, I didn't need to look in order to know what was going on. But I did anyways. When I flipped my wrist over, I found the crimson knot gone. The line was disjointed and a sort of strangely done star had appeared. I didn't know what it meant and I didn't really want to know. But a few more tears trickled down my face and even my chin started to bob and quiver as it hit me.

Everything I'd been holding out for was a lie. I'd romanticized everything into being something it wasn't. And there was no one to blame but myself.

Long, pale piano fingers curled around my wrist gently and I was pulled into an unwanted hug. But I let him do it anyways because it was better than nothing and that was pretty much what I had.

*

He didn't understand what he did. That was pretty much clear as he tried to continue talking to me as Kells took me back to my room. Jesse kept trying to tell him I just needed space, that everything would be fine once all the information was allowed to sink in. What he wasn't saying but was clear between the lines was 'You broke her heart now it's time to leave her alone'.

But Cecil just wasn't getting it.

He followed all the way to the door of my room, only stopping because he couldn't cross the threshold. I'd never granted him access and for that I was grateful. Maybe I was thinking clearly on that one. Kells quietly closed the door even though Cecil told him not to.

"You were wrong," I said into the dim light of the room.

He sat down next to me with a sigh. "You've lost faith. It's easy for you to say that now."

"But it's true. He told me he hated me." I looked up at him. "How does that happen? I loved him the whole time and he hated me. Who despises me this much to..."

"No one hates you."

"That's not true. First they took my mother, then they took my best friend, and now, even after getting him back, it's not going to be the same. It's not going to be what I hoped."