Sorry for the wait... Life got intense. Still is :/ Enjoy anyway, sorry if it's not my best chapter.
It was unbelievable, the feeling of Justin’s hand around mine again. Sometimes I found that I could hardly focus on our conversation – his presence was nearly intoxicating. I had to constantly remind myself that I was angry with him and that I was dating Will. I wondered if holding Justin’s hand was wrong…
Too bad I don’t care.
I’ll have to do some serious reevaluation of our situation tonight.
Our walk wasn’t how I’d dreamt it would be. Yes, at some point over the last three years I have dreamt about seeing Justin again, and we usually ended up doing something similar to this. However, when I saw us walking hand in hand, we were usually somewhere outside. In a park sometimes, or down a rural road back home in Canada. And we talked about more intense topics than what each other’s been up to for the last three years. Depressingly enough but unsurprising, Justin’s stories were twenty times more impressive than mine. He’s been all over the world, which I guess I already knew. He’s met countless celebrities that I could only dream of meeting. For the first time I’ll admit that I’m completely jealous of him; I’ve never admitted to being jealous of someone before.
Anyway, as I was saying, our walk wasn’t exactly how I’d imagined it. Instead, we never left Barnes & Noble, weaving through the aisles that Justin was sure would be emptiest. We stayed away from Teen Fiction, Romance, Sci-Fi…those kinds of genres. It seems foolish to think that when I’d first arrived I was mesmerized by all the books, scanning each and every back binding and cover, stopping to read the summary on the backs. Now, all I can see, hear, smell, and feel is Justin.
I had no idea how much I really missed him until now.
Something was different, though, and I couldn’t figure out what it was until we’d been walking for over an hour and I could tell our little meeting would soon be coming to an end. Our conversations were drying up, and I’d gotten at least five text messages that I’ve been ignoring. No doubt, they’re from my mother.
“So, why are you in New York?” I asked, hoping to keep him here just a little bit longer. I was afraid that if he’d leave, I wouldn’t see him again for years.
“Scooter has some kind of business to take care of. I’m sort of on a vacation, I guess you could say,” he shrugged.
I nodded, failing at keeping a conversation going.
“So, how are you and Will? Is he still the way he was when I left?”
I couldn’t help raising a brow. “How was he before you left?”
“I don’t know. Fake, I guess.”
“Fake?” I asked, shocked at this new discovery. Justin had encouraged me to go out with him back then. Had he been hiding what he really thought this whole time? “What do you mean?”
“I don’t know, it just seemed like… I don’t know,” he stammered. Then he glanced down at me. “Is he different now? Better?”
I hunched my shoulders, not sure how to answer. I can I compare the Will of back then and the one I was with now when I couldn’t tell a difference? “I guess. He’s just… He was there, you know? For me. He was there for me.”
I instantly regretted the words as soon as they left my lips. Yes, I was angry, but I didn’t want to upset Justin right now. I decided that I’d miss him and be grateful for being with him now and be mad at him later. Biting my lip, I risked a glance up at him to see his reaction.
To my surprise, he didn’t seem to be reacting to a thing I said. It was as if I hadn’t spoken at all – either that, or he’s gotten extremely good at composing himself.
“Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good guy,” Justin continued, unaware of the mistake that had crossed my lips. I was yet again grateful. “I just thought he wasn’t really himself before. Maybe he is now. How long have you two been together?”
|Justin Bieber||as himself|
|Alexandra Chando||as Arikka Heart|
|Chaz Somers||as himself|
|Ryan Butler||as himelf|
|Christian Beadles||as himself|
|Dylan O'Brien||as Will Carter|
|Willa Holland||as Erin Heart|
|Demi Moore||as Casey Heart|