A Letter To Those Who Made A Difference In My Life

((Author's Note: Sorry I had to repost these so that they would NOT be Rated R or Restricted, I apologize.))

Dear Leandra

I'm supposed to be sleeping now, but I couldn't.. because I really wanted to get your letter written. I think most people know you on here as IJ.. but I know you as my best friend of 14 years.

We've known each other two/thirds of our entire lives.. I'd venture to say I knew you better than your own parents at this point. I love you so much LeeLee, more than I will ever be able to write in a little fucking letter.

I have a shitty memory, we both know that.. but I can still remember how we met.

It's so damn cliche..

I was the puny whimp on the playground, and you were too.. but when a few kids started pushing me around, you stood up for me (even if you got your ass handed to you by them along with me).. I'll never forget that.

I've been there with you through thick and then, tall and small.. and I'd never want it any other way.

Remember that time we found out your younger brother was terrified of hair in his food and he always ended up crying when he found any there.. and we'd pull strands of our own hair out and put it in his food when he only had a couple bites left just to fuck with him? Those were the days..

and remember when we found out both our grandparents lived in El Paso.. and after you were sent there, I demanded to go there too.. I still can't believe your grandmother paid for me a ticket. It amazes me how your family could love me more than my own, they called me their son, their grandson.. and even when your grandpa tried to give me the bird and bee talk, no matter how embarrassing that was at 15 years old, I loved him all the more for it, because he bothered, because he took that time out of his own schedule.

I love that we have the same taste in music, so we never argue about what to listen to when driving in the car, I love that you trust me to have your back, that you never hide anything from me..

I love that you always believed in me. When I was 12 and wanted to become an astronaut, you begged your dad to buy me a book about it.. when I was 14 and wanted to be a police officer, you got terrified but you still supported me (and tried to talk me out of it with horror stories about getting killed in duty) and when I was 15, and needed money desperately to pay bills, you asked your dad to take me to work with him, and he taught me all i know. With his help, I was able to keep electricity in our house, and was able to pay rent and keep our water running when my father couldn't do it any longer.

I love... you, i just love everything about you.. and you know, for the longest time, I was IN love with you. Nearly 5 years ago, I had everything planned out, I was going to ask you to go out with me.. but when I got there.. you were so excited, because you'd just gotten a new boyfriend.. at the time, i figured I'd just have to wait a couple of months until you guys broke up and I could just ask you then..

But as time went on.. you didn't break up. Instead you fell more in love with him.. and when you showed me your engagement ring, I thought I'd die..

But I didn't, I went on with my life, ignoring how much it hurt to look at him with you.. but you were so happy.. so I tried my hardest to get over it.

I got with a new girl.. and slowly, I fell in love with her and ended up getting her pregnant before proposing and I thought we were meant to be together, we made a pretty little family..

and she gave me the most beautiful little girl, and as far as I'm concerned the sun rises and falls upon her gorgeous blond hair..

and after she was born, her mom told me that while she was pregnant, only a week after I had proposed to her..

She left the day before my mom committed suicide.. and took my baby girl with her..

and I probably would have died of heartbreak if it hadn't been for you, as corny as that sounds.

You are my rock, you are my anchor, you are my best friend.

I want to always be there for you, as you've done for me.

Thank you.

Your Bitch Forever,

xBenji